Breaking the Cinderella Rules

❁ Giving ALL OF ME

The votes from the last chapter are highly appreciated :D I LOVE YOU ALL <3 I'm so sorry it took me longer to update. But I promise that next week will be better. I'm going to have a short holiday in two weeks, and during that holiday, I would update as frequently as I can! Anyway, here's another chapter for you :) It's just a transitioning chapter. We're going to Sweden, everyone! The next chapter will involve a torn Cinder on two mystery letters :)

Song: All of me by John Legend

Chapter 22—Giving ALL OF ME

Cinder

Ash was sleeping on the couch with people staring at him. His uncaring attitude was clearly shown by the way he placed his shoes on top of the couch. Hugging the couch in an awkward position, his face mirrored a pained expression. I wondered what he was dreaming about, and I hoped it was something milder, less painful than his current life. No matter how strong you are, you need to just stop and relax for a while. Everyone needs a break. No one is as strong as titanium.

A smile crept up my face when I saw him sleeping soundlessly. Secretly, I envied how he was able to sleep that comfortably in public. Ash was used to many attention. He was incredibly attractive anyway. Girls passing would swoon when they saw him sleeping like this. Only conceited adults would shake their heads at him. He looked terribly worn out.

For the first time, I took a step closer and gazed at him. Warmth had reached my cheeks as I held his hand. He groaned as soon as my touch left his skin, and I gently shushed him. Ash was having a terrible dream, and I winced at the thought of his dream. It felt dreadful to think that reality and a dream would end drastically awful. Reality and a dream would no longer feel different. They would be the same, painful and disastrous.

His hair was tousled, and with his eyes closed, Ash looked like all the other boys in school. He didn’t deserve to have such a terrible life, being forced to kill. But apparently, the world was cruel. He was insisted to do things he never dared to do. Now, he was used to it, and the cruelty of killing had poisoned him. His innocence was abused.

My heart ached, and my mind swirled. Turning my heels around, I stormed for the double doors before the tears would run out. I couldn’t believe Cinder Roxanne was emotional, pathetically weak. Tears were signs of weakness, and I would pay the devils to allow me to hide this weakness.

Slapping my own cheeks, I tried to get myself back into the courageous and spiteful Cinder. The sarcastic Cinder was way better than the emotional Cinder. But then, who is Cinder? She could be two girls with different personalities at the same time. I couldn’t choose between the two, because deep inside my heart, I didn’t know who I was. It was hard to be a different type of person when you’ve worked so hard to be another. Cinder Van Hoyer was caring and loving. Cinder Roxanne was evil to the bones.

But I am Cinder. Just Cinder.

I didn’t want to be a Roxanne. I refused to be evil. However, I rejected myself to be a Van Hoyer. In this world, being caring and loving gives you disadvantages. Caring and loving are only for the weak. The strong must fight in all situations, even if it means hurting people.

Blinking, I couldn’t believe I was thinking of things this deeply.

Please, please, please.

I want to be different.

Let me be kind and strong at the same time.

“Cinder?”

I blinked away some tears and quickly wiped them. His deep voice echoed in my ears, and I kept my face away from him, trying to hide these tears. From behind me, I sensed Andrew Evans folding his arms and shaking his head. He gave me a moment to steady, and for comfort, he took my hand into his. Squeezing my hand, I felt strength growing straight from the center of my soul. Andrew was making me stronger, fearless.