Fame Crazy (Sequel to Strings Attached)

Chapter 53

"Hey, Castiel," Gabriel says, hanging over the top bunk and looking down at his younger brother.

Castiel ignores him. Per usual.

"So, I was thinking," Gabriel continues, "We haven't gone bowling in years. We should go today. Just you and me. Some quality middle-children time."

Castiel continues ignoring him.

"It could be really fun," Gabriel adds.

Castiel, gasp, doesn't answer.

"I know it doesn't seem it, but it's always way more fun when you're there than it sounds when you're just talking about it," Gabriel tells him.

Castiel sighs and rolls over to look at his brother. "Go take Sam."

"I don't want to go with Sam. I want to go with you," Gabriel tells him. "It doesn't have to be bowling. We could... we could go mini golfing. Or... Oh! I know! We could go to Thunder Road! Laser tag? Huh? Huh? Come on, you know you want to."

Castiel doesn't answer, knowing Gabriel will take it as no.

"Aw, c'mon, Cassie!" he whines. "Let's do something! Anything!"

Castiel rolls over so he's facing the wall, his back to his brother.

"Can you at least talk to me?" Gabriel asks. "Five minutes. That's all I'm asking."

Silence.

"Please? I'm not asking for much. One conversation. That's it."

Castiel rolls over to face his brother again. "Just leave me alone, Gabriel."

"Not happening," he replies, climbing down from the top bunk and sitting next to his brother on the bottom one instead. "Come on. Sit up. Let's talk, brother to brother."

And, even though every fiber of his being just wants to curl up in a little ball and pretend he doesn't exist, he does what his brother says, keeping about a foot between them. Instead of looking at the boy, he looks straight ahead, supporting his head in his hands.

"Are you okay?" Gabriel asks him.

"Of course," Castiel replies, his voice empty. "I'm fine."

"Okay, let's try this again. Are you really okay?"

Castiel sighs. "I haven't been okay in years."

Gabriel frowns at that. "Oh. You wanna talk about it?"

"Not particularly, no."

"Will you talk about it just to humor me?" Gabriel asks.

"I'd rather not."

"Okay, I get it. Is there anything I could do to help make you feel less not-okay?"

"Not really."

Gabriel nods thoughtfully, attempting to think of something — anything — that will help his brother feel better. A smile creeps up onto his face as he says, " I think I know what you need."

Castiel finally looks over at him, his curiosity piqued.

"You need a day out. You and I should go around town — the entire state, even — and just have fun. Huh? Huh? Sounds like a good idea, doesn't it?"

"Not at all."

Gabriel's smile falls at that. "Why not?"

"I just don't want to."

"But —"

"I said I don't want to," Castiel snaps.

Gabriel opens his mouth to say something, but he seems to think better of it and stops. After a pause, he says cautiously, "So, I've been texting Sam..."

Castiel looks over at him expectantly.

"He says Dean's doing just about as well as you," Gabriel continues.

"I don't want to talk about Dean," Castiel mutters.

"Well, too bad. Look, Dean's heartbroken, you're heartbroken, and literally no one is winning from this. You'd both be happier if you got back together, so go do it. Like, right now. Go."

"I'm not going to do that," Castiel replies.

"Why not?"

Because Dean deserves better.

"Because I'm not."

"But he'd take you back in a heartbeat," Gabriel insists.

"No," Castiel insists.

"But he obviously didn't actually want to break up with you! He gave you every opportunity to stop him. I'm sure it's not too late."

"I don't want t— Wait, how do you know what happened?" Castiel asks cautiously.

"I, err..." Gabriel tugs at the collar of his shirt nervously. "I... Fuck."

"What?" Castiel asks impatiently.

"It... Look, you know I hate keeping things from you, but, uh... I can't tell you."

"Tell me. Now."

Gabriel looks over at the door helplessly. He glances back at his brother before calling loudly, "Luci! I dun goofed!"

It's a few moments later that Lucifer appears in the doorway, looking annoyed. "Dude! I was Facebooking!" he whines.

"A grand total of zero fucks are being given right now," Gabriel replies.

"What's Gabriel not supposed to tell me?" Castiel asks.

Lucifer's eyebrows draw together in confusion, then realization seems to dawn on him and he glares at his younger brother. "Seriously, Gabe? I asked you to do one thing, and you already screwed it up?"

"Sorry?" Gabriel says awkwardly. "Um... I'm just gonna leave you to clean up my mess and I'm gonna... go..." He sprints out of the room and away from Lucifer, who just shares his head in annoyance.

"What's going on?" Castiel asks hesitantly.

Lucifer sighs and walks over to the boy, sitting down on the bed next to him. "It's not as big a deal as Gabriel's making it look like. I just didn't want to bother you after... well, after everything that's happened lately, ya know?"

"Tell me."

He sighs. "Right. Um... Well, someone recognized you at the ice cream place and they must've caught you and Dean being all coupley and decided to record the cuteness and they caught you and Dean fighting on video and now it's kinda gone viral." He says the last part into his hand, as if Castiel won't be able to hear it.

Castiel collapses into his bed and buries his face in his pillow instead of responding.

"So... you good?" Lucifer asks cautiously.

"I hate my life," Castiel mutters into his pillow.

Lucifer sighs. "Right... Well, it'll blow over soon, and no one will even remember this in a few weeks. That's how it always goes, right?"

Castiel doesn't bother explaining how this is different, because he's sure Lucifer wouldn't understand. There's a difference between what he usually gets in trouble for — his weird, usually comical stunts out of boredom — and this. This is the first time anyone outside of his personal life gets to see him as who he really is, behind the carefree charade he's famous for — now, people can see how much of an asshole he really is.

"You took this fairly well," Lucifer observes.

"Can I just sulk in peace?"

"Sure. I'll be back to check on you after I strangle Gabriel, so don't do anything stupid, 'kay?"

He listens to the sound of Lucifer's footsteps until he's far enough away that he's out of hearing distance. Part of him wants to sob into his pillow until he runs out of tears to cry, but another part of him is too empty to really care about any of this. So instead, Castiel just stares into his pillow until eventually, he falls into a blissful sleep.