Ae dil hai mushkil ?

5

Neil was home. Well to call this place home wouldn't be correct, his real home would be where ever Avni was. He sat on the swing on his balcony looking up at the stars. She would do the same when all those misunderstandings were stirred. He remembered one time when she had even slept out here on the swing.

*Flashback*

She was broken, her heart had physically split into pieces, she couldn't look at Neil. Rhea had shown her those pictures and she just couldn't. How was it possible that the person who can be responsible for your smile could also be the reason for your tears. Like they say... Love doesn't have a self-destruct. We choke it with our unkind words. We starve it with empty promises. We poison it with toxic blame. We break it by trying to bend it to our will. No,love doesn't die on its own. We kill it. Breath,by bitter breath. Wise are those who realise that they hold the fate of love in their own hands, and blessed are those who keep it alive. Her mascara stained her features just like the pain in her eyes, her lips quivered and her body shook with her tears. She was in pain no doubt. Neil walked in and saw her, he wanted to talk to her comfort her but he stopped himself, he was trying to prove her innocence and was playing this drama. But what happened between him and Rhea was never supposed to happen it just did. And he knew that deep down despite trying to save her honour, he was killing her from within. He pushed his emotions aside and made himself comfortable on his bed. He watched her as she looked up at the sky shaking with every breath. His heart broke, as he muttered "Forgive me Avni." Slowly his eye lids became heavy with sleep but he took her image in before he let sleep consume him. The following morning he woke up and half asleep he walked into the washroom, getting ready. Walking out he had expected Avni to be in the room but she wasn't. He looked around and found her asleep on the swing, her face was streaked with tears and her mascara was leaking down her face, strands of her hair were caressing her face, and her arms were wrapped around herself trying to keep herself warm. He crouched down, moving her hair away from her face, she was stone cold, no body heat at all, his eyes widened as he tried to shake her awake. After a few attempts she woke up and looked him dead in the eye, she didn't say anything, she averted her gaze and walked in to there room before grabbing her clothes and locking herself in the bathroom. He tried to drown out her cry's that echoed but he couldn't he walked up to the bathroom door as he heard a slash against what sounded like skin. His heart dropped. He banged against the door "Avni...Avni open the door." He choked against his own words, was she harming herself over this. He hit the door in frustration "GOD-DAMN IT Avni open the fucking door." she didn't reply causing him to get more worried by the second. "Avni if you don't open the door i'll break it."She still hadn't replied."Fine...." He walked back slightly before running into the door with full force pushing the door of its hinges. There she was, sitting with her back pressed against the wall, water falling on her drenching her hair and clothes but what shocked him more was the cuts on her arms that had blood oozing out. She was self- harming. He rushed forth and turned off the shower, he tried to get her to stand up but she straight out didn't move in response. He bent down and picked her up bridal style. He carried her out and sat her on the sofa grabbing the first aid box on the side. He sat on the table in front of her taking out the antiseptic, he grasped her arm taking , looking at the cuts that grazed her arms, they all looked fresh. His eyes became moist as he put it one her arms, he expected her to flinch but she didn't she was just staring into space, he was scared seeing her like this. He finished cleaning the cuts on one arm and wrapped a bandage around it before moving to grasp the other, she moved back holding her hand up "Its fine i'll do it myself." She picked up the antiseptic and began to cake her arm in it, she closed her eyes like she was enjoying the pain. Neil looked at her startled, he grabbed her arm and bandaged it up. Her expression changed. She walked out leaving him there staring after her with concern.

*End of flashback*

He still remembered that day like it was yesterday, he broke his Avni he shattered her with no mercy, he knew how broken she was, he knew what she had grown up seeing and still he...did the same thing as her father but even worse. He questioned her character, her upbringing knowing that she had her childhood snatched from her. She had never been shown mercy and he too in the whole drama broke her twice as much, he knew that her heart that was slowly mending broke into a thousand more pieces. Seeing her in that office made him realise that fact. She had grown from the ruins she laid in, she had built a life for herself and he could see that she wasn't going to let anyone take that from her. She was stronger that before, more fierce, like a lioness without her mate-taking control of all the situations herself. When he first saw her, his mouth went dry and his knees went weak, she looked gorgeous, but not the innocent type the deadly type, her looks were lethal and striked his heart. Her red lipstick which coated her lips teased him to no ends and that playful smirk he saw when she deliberately barged into him left him feeling unsatisfied. And now he was finally able to understand the quote 'A single moment of misunderstanding is sometimes so poisonous that it makes us forget with in a minute the hundred lovable moments spent together. '

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