Terrifyingly strange thoughts of the cool type

BEST COUSINS EVER

I MISTOOK TWO FOR TWELVE, AND SOMEHOW GOT EIGHT FROM FIVE. THIS IS THE BEST DAY EVER. I GET TWO BABIES ALL TO MYSELF! I am so happy! Meet Aki and Fuyumi, they're my minions and do anything I say!

We're playing by the dining room. I want to keep them! XxHitachiinTwinsxX I SHIT YOU NOT I WANT THEM. THIS IS WHAT I WANT, YOU LITTLE SHIT. I JUST NEVER WANT THEM TO AGE. THEY'LL BECOME DAMN ENTITLED RICH 10 YEAR OLDS SOMEDAY AND THAT MAKES ME SO SAD! You have no idea how good it feels to be able to boss them around and have them listen to me. I love it. They LISTEN. That is why they are the best children ever. My aunt raised them right. This makes me so glad. Two and five, I like babies because they can't talk, therefore, can't complain. They can cry but their attention span is so short it's easy to distract them, and same with Fuyumi, she may be five but easy to distract and listens well though you do have to repeat it three times because she gets a bit distracted but that's fine. They'll eat anything because they're not old enough to fully understand what an opinion is and they like everything I cook them. I could give two fucks about "waking up in the middle of the night", how do you wake up when you're not asleep? And diapers, I could do that all day, I handle worse shit such as entitled little nine year old shits that think they deserve everything (Eyan, except he doesn't bother me like Ebina.) and the crap Tamaki drags me into without considering the consequences or anyone else's feelings on the matter.

Now that I think of it, if I were a house wife, I'd be one kick-ass housewife.

Sebastian Michaelis thinks he's all that.

Please,
I'm one hell of a housewife and could probably care for your little twerp better than you can.

Someone find a Sebastian Michaelis and make him read this. Housewives work harder than butlers and how.