Things Wattpad Authors Do That I Hate

Chapter 16

I'm really on a roll this week. I updated Shopaholic and this book twice in two DAYS!!

YOU MAKE ME FEEL LIKE A DANGEROUS WOMAN!!!

Now, I don't necessarily like to read books where the author introduces the MC fully in the first sentence or like the first chapter.

For example: Hi, my name is Anna Whatchamacallit and I am umpteen years old. I have shitty coloured hair and brown eyes. The same exact colour like poop. I attend Westview High School blah blah blah etc

Bruh.

Who are you? Speedy Gonzalez? Slow down homie.

It's just the first chapter.

I like when it flows in accordance not just one big lump of nothing ness.

Before I read a book, I go and read the description. Which is the logical thing to do.

Don't FuDgInG tell me to read the book to find out what it's about. Don't force me to read it, or else I swear I'm going to skip to the end to see what's up. That's blackmail. Book style.

Oh, do any of you hate when the author makes up an excuse for having a shitty book:

I wrote this when I was young.

Mhmm.

If you know your book is not so good, don't blame it on your child self.

You know you wrote that book when you were in your mid twenties, so don't lie.

Some actually are telling the truth, but I'm talking about the ones that LIE just so people could feel sorry for them.

You know when you were little, Wattpad wasn't even invented yet.

Ancient ass.