A Pleasant Surprise - Niall Horan fanfic

Chapter 36

Sophie's P.O.V

I stared out the car window as the rain poured down. I wiped away a few tears with my sleeve. We were almost at my apartment, Niall was asleep next to me. I kept trying to figure out how I'll tell him. I even tried to imagine what he'd say. I played up the scenes over and over again in my head but it never came out right. It always ended with him walking out on me. Every. Single. Time.

"Niall?" I whispered. No answer, he was still asleep. I sighed and rested my head on the cold window, closed my eyes and tried to not think about what was going to happen. I thought about the day, how we said goodbye to everyone Ireland, how we sneaked through the V.I.P entrance without anyone noticing, forced away the nightmare I had on the plane, thought about the look on Niall's face when he saw Paul at Heathrow. I held on to the last thought for quite a while, just becuse that's how I always want to see Niall; happy and smiling. I don't want my last memories of him to be horrible and the last thing I want is to see his back when he walks out on me. On the other hand...

"No, stop thinking like that." But maybe it's best that way?

"You can't do that, how can you even think of it?" I won't have to face him then.

"No, don't leave him."  I can't. Stupid thought. It would make it easier for him though...

"Maybe you're wrong, maybe you're not pregnant." I flinched and quickly wiped my tears away.

"Soph, are you awake?" Niall stroked my arm. I just nodded, I didn't even turn around to look at him. "We're here. We're home Sophie." I could hear him smiling. I just wanted him to hold me, comfort me, to tell me everything is going to be okay and that he would never leave me. But I couldn't even face him. I guess you could say I was ashamed of myself...maybe for letting it happen, for not noticing. Suddenly Niall opened the door, I almost fell out of it. I hadn't even noticed him getting out.

"It's raining, I'll run inside and get you an umbrella." He smiled and hurried off.

"This is your chance, do it now." I jumped out of the car and ran through the pouring rain to the mailbox. God bless Ellie, she was an angel for helping me out. There was no way in hell that I would've been able to go myself and buy a pregnancy test. It would be all over the press. Sometimes I miss doing those normal things. The things I was able to do before. But I would give all those things up any day for Niall. I caught myself wandering off in my mind, I had to hurry up. I picked up the test and put it into my pocket. It felt like my pocket was on fire, I could feel the contoures of the test. I honestly felt like I'd stolen something.

"Soph get inside, it's freezing!" Niall yelled as he came down the stairs with an umbrella. He handed it to me and kissed me on the cheek. "Hurry up inside, I'll bring the suitcases."

"I'm not ready for this. We're not ready for this. He'll leave me. I can't live without him." I sat down on the bathroom floor with the test in my hands. It said 10-15 minutes but I couldn't stop staring at it. This test, those lines on the monitor determined my whole future. It's all about those lines. 1 or 2 lines. I kept looking at the clock. 1 minute, 2 minutes, 3 minutes...still nothing. Then it really hit me. What if I really am pregnant? My first thought was to get rid of it. But as I sat in Niall's mum's bathroom and thought about it I realised that it's a part of me, a parrt of Niall, a part of us. A big ball of love. A symbol of our love. A symbol that we aren't ready for. I felt the anger, the sorrow, the hurt, the loneliness and the helplessness boiling up in me. I threw the test at the wall and broke down in tears. I heard Niall saying goodbye to the driver and listened to the sound of his footsteps as he came through the door.