The Professor

Twenty-one

The drive back is quiet. Finally, after a moment, I say, "Thank you."

He glances at me from the road. "For what?"

"For talking with me and being a good friend, even when I was an ass." I stare at my lap.

He grins at the road. "Anything for you, even when you're an ass." He smiles at me.

I glance up and smile.

"So what are you going to do?" He gazes back at the road. "About Professor Collins?"

I suck in my lips as I stare out the window. "I don't know. I'm not even sure what I feel is real anymore."

He slowly exhales. "Look, I didn't mean to get into your head." He doesn't remove his eyes from the road. "I just wanted you to be a little more careful. If he is what you want, then go for it. Just know your cautions."

I glance at him, then back out the window as we pull up to a red light. There's an Ihop to the right. I've not eaten at all today, despite my parents offering lunch. I wasn't hungry. Perhaps my appetite failed with the fact that my parents are around while Dean is on my mind. However, that hunger has caught up with me now.

"Can you stop here?" I gesture my chin towards the building.

He smiles at me. "Ihop?"

"Yes." I chuckle. "I haven't eaten all day." My fingers brush my hair back.

He nods. "That sounds like an emergency. We need to get you food now." He smiles while turning right into the parking lot.

I grin at my lap. I'm glad to be with him right now. He's been helpful with all of this. Maybe I do love Dean, maybe I don't. I know that I can talk to Blake about it more. He seems like someone who's familiar with these things. I, on the other hand, am not.

We are directed to a table by the window when we walk in. I sit across from Blake.

"How. . .do I know if I love him?" I ask after a gulp.

The waitress sets down menus on our table.

His eyes glance down then back up. "It's the little things. One day, you wake up and the first person you think of is him. Sometimes it's the small gestures he'll make for you or even how happy he makes you." He grabs the salt shaker and examines it. "I wouldn't put so much thought into it. Like I said, you just know."

"What can I get you guys to drink?" The red-headed waitress politely asks. She glances at Blake with a shy smile.

"Water." I glance up at her.

"Water." Blake repeats to the waitress.

She smiles at Blake, her cheeks turning red. Obviously she likes him. I glance at him to see if he notices. He just watches me instead, ignoring the obvious, crushing girl beside him. She nods once and turns around anxiously towards the back. He then lays his eyes on the salt shaker.

I nod my head slowly after thinking about it. "He does. . .make me happy. He's very considerate and generous. I know that he wouldn't ever do anything to hurt me." I smile at the table and open the menu.

Why did I ever get second thoughts about him? Of course I love him.

"But?" He glances up from the salt shaker. He sets it down to pick up his menu.

"But what?" I chuckle. "That's it." My eyes draw down at the list of pancakes. I begin to consider if I want plain or chocolate chip.

He presses his lips into a hard line. "You didn't sound sure." His hands rest the menu flat down on the table.