The Professor

Thirty-two

  I smile breathlessly while excitement bubbles in my stomach.

  Dean got his job back. He's not getting fired.

"Yes!" I squeal as I walk back towards Aaron.

  A smile grows on his face. "What?"

"Dean got his job back." I flash my teeth while sliding my phone back in my back pocket.

"Really? That's great!" His expression lights up. "How did he get it back?"

"I talked to his boss about some school policies and we worked things out. Dean can keep his job." A giggle of excitement slips my lips.

  I'm glad he can keep his job. He's the one man on this planet that truly deserves to keep it.

  Aaron tilts his head with an amused look. "You did this?"

  I nod. "Yeah, I felt awful for losing his job. It's the least I could do. Plus, he really does deserve this."

  He smiles at the ground. "You amaze me." He then adds, "When will you tell Dean the good news?"

  My character falls. I almost forgotten what I told him today. I can't be the one to tell him this. His boss will. It's better that way.

"I'm not going to tell him." I sigh.

  He twists his face. "Why not?"

"I told him some things that may have hurt him." I stare at the ground. "I don't think we could ever see each other again."

  He huffs. "Don't be ridiculous. What did you say to him?"

  I search the room, finding any way to explain this without sounding like a bully. "I told him that I hate him."

  He frowns. "Rosie, you don't hate him. Why did you tell him that?"

  I roll my eyes. "I know. I just can't be with him. I only hurt him the more I see him and the more I kiss him. We're always up and down. It's just not healthy for him. He deserves better." My voice lowers.

  He shakes his head. "You pushed him away in order to keep him happy. You say that he deserves better, but that kind of sacrifice sounds like love to me." He avoids eye contact with a sigh.

  He's right. Either way, I can't be with him. It just won't work.

"It doesn't matter." My voice softly utters. "I'll still hurt him."

  He steps forward once. "Alright, I won't force you to change your mind, but at least think about it."

"That's all I've been doing." My voice rises as I swing my arms out by my side. "After a long time deliberating what's best for him, it came down to this."

  He nods. "As long as you know what you're doing and that you're sure of it, then I can agree. I see what you're doing and I think it's reasonable. It's very selfless of you." He grins warmly.

  I just hope that this is the best choice. It has to.

* * *

   It's too early for me to be up on a Saturday morning. . .4:30 AM to be exact. It's worth it. The sun is still faintly hidden and the air is freezing, but it's fresh and calming.

  I've chosen to sit under my favorite tree in my gray pajamas, one in which would clear my mind each day. However, today I'm at ease for once. I feel like I have all my ducks in a row. Sure, I may not have recieved much out of the situation, but at least I know Dean will be better off without me. I did make a great choice.

I sip my pumpkin spice latte while enjoying the view. No one is one is out here this morning. I assume they are all sleeping. Not me.

I've always been an early bird. Sleepovers were awful for me, however. I would wake up before everyone with an hour to spare. My friends thought I was crazy.

  This morning is different, though. Different from any other early morning. Perhaps, it could be my mind at ease and the weight lifted from my shoulders or it could it even be this delicious drink I can only have once a year. Whatever the reason, I'm glad to finally feel this happy again.

"You seriously need to stop waking up so early." I hear Dean's voice in front of me.

  My eyes draw up his long legs to his eyes. I tilt my head.

"What are you doing here so early?" I stand so I can see him better.

  He grins. "Well, I got my job back, so I'm here early to set my room back up. I saw you from the hall window."

  I smile, pretending to be surprised about getting his job back. "You got your job back? How great!"

  His grin moves to the side while he folds his arms. "I did. Thanks to you."

  I roll my eyes. "You know?"

  He nods his head. "Robert told me." He adds, "Thank you."

  I pucker my lips to the side while staring at the ground. "You deserve it. " I utter. My eyes then meet his. "Aren't you mad at me? I said some mean stuff."

  He swallows hard. "You did. . .but I know you don't mean any of that." His eyes darken. 

  I huff. "I did mean it. I never loved you." My voice is soft. "When will you believe me?"

"When you finally tell the truth." He declares gently and patiently.

"Then you will be waiting for a while." I push past him, hoping that I sounded legitimate.

Although, his distant chuckling tells me otherwise.

* * *

  When I return back to my dorm, Julie sits on her bed with her laptop.

  I check the time. 5:06 AM. She's never up this early.

  I chuckle. "What are you doing up so early?" My feet stride me towards my dresser.

  She glances up from her laptop. "Working on a paper. It's due in a few days."

"That's commitment." I smirk as I open my top drawer. I pull out my pink silk bra and remove my shirt, my back facing her.

"Call it what you want," She declares while watching herself type. "but I'm turning this in finished."

  I tighten my bra on, strapping it behind my back as I watch myself in the mirror. "That's commitment." I playfully joke.

  She shakes her head while smiling. "Dedication."

  I stare at my topless reflection, focusing on my breast that seem tighter in my bra than usual. My palms fetch my breasts. "My boobs seem a little bigger today."

  Julie snorts at her laptop. "Last time I heard that in high school, my friend ended up pregnant." She chuckles.

   My eyes widen. I quickly stare at the puppy calendar on the wall to see that I am past my menstrual date.

"Oh fuck!" I shout.