When school is over I run outside, trying to avoid all of those pathetic looks. I get to Elli's car, where he's already standing, waiting for me. We usually go to school and back home together, with his car. Well, he gives me a ride, because he has his driving licence and I am currently in the process of getting mine, so I can't drive yet, plus I don't have my own car and he does.
He smirks when I get to him, like he is charmed. His eyes light up immediately, when he sees me. I can see he is very happy to see me, but I don't understand why. I mean, happy as in seeing the love of his life, not his best friend. Plus, I look terrible, and no one should be happy about seeing me right now.
We sit in the car and he smirks at me again.
''What?'' I ask annoyed.
''Nothing. You're just very beautiful.''
I look at him and see in his eyes what the catch is. Even if he is telling the truth, and I am beautiful, I know he's just trying to make me feel better, because he heard of what happened between me and Ashley. Even though people didn't care and did nothing, they saw. They saw everything and the news of how Ashley has the disturbed under control spread more quickly that an airborne virus. Now, everyone is talking about it, looking at me with disgust, some with pity, and I knew it was just a matter of time, before it got to Elliott.
Him and Ashley actually dated for some time, before he met me, or better yet, started talking to me. They were together for a short period of time, but it was enough for her to get obsessed with him. Even though we are not really together at school, because we almost have no classes together and for lunch he is with his other, guy friends, Ashley knows of our friendship. She's tried to get Elli to her side before, but he won't let her. So that is another reason for hating me. She want Elliott back, but we all know that is never going to happen. But the more she sees me with him, the more dangerous she gets, and so I get more afraid and stay away from Elli. Then she has more opportunities to get to him, and I spend less time with him. It's like an enchanted circle.
I look at him with appreciation for trying to make me feel better and say:''You know you don't have to do that.''
''Do what?'' He pretends not to know what I'm talking about. But I know he knows exactly what I'm talking about.
''Elliott, come on. I know that you heard about what happened.''
He is looking at the road firmly, his lips are pressed together.
''I'm sorry. I just ...'' He says, then pauses and continues:''I feel like it's my fault Ashley treats you the way she does. I just don't want to see you hurt, and I know she is making you hurt a lot.''
He gives me a sympathetic look and I sigh. I rub his shoulder, look at him and say:''It's not your fault. She's just a bitch and you can't do anything about it. I'll survive.''
Even though BITCH is an understatement for her and I'm not sure I even want to survive or if I will, I want to make him feel better just as he wants for me.
''I swear to god, if there was anything I could do, K, I would. You know I've tried to make her stop before, but she just won't quit it. Like she's determined to make your life worse.''
I sigh and nod:''She is. But it's not your fault.''
His eyes flicker and he presses his lips together even tighter. ''I just don't want to see you hurt. I don't want to see sadness and pain in your eyes, but I do almost every time I see you.''
When he says the truth I am shocked. I didn't know it was so obvious that he noticed. I mean, I know he is my best friend and he knows me better than anyone else, but still... I hide it as hard as I can.
He says:''I know what you're thinking. And yes, I've noticed. I see it K. I see the hurt and the pain, and I just want to make it go away. But I don't really know how to.''
Strangely, I feel relieved that he's noticed my pain. I like to keep it locked inside, not show it to anyone, and even though there are almost no walls between me and Elli, I don't want him to see it. But this time I am happy that he noticed it. I don't know why, but all of a sudden I feel less pain, and more love because he is right there next to me. I lean my head against his shoulder and smile.
I say:"We're gonna be together forever right?"
Elliott responds with our moto, which are words that give us hope and strength.
He says:"Anywhere,any time,at any cost."
Nevertheless, it doesn't help when I get home and I'm all alone.I feel lonely and lost. I go straight to my room and cry. I cry out all of Ashley's words, all of the looks, all the pain, the loneliness, my whole life. And then I go to the bathroom, take my razor out and cut. I let the blood drip down my hand while I cry.
After I am done, I clean up and write Evie a message. I need her to know, I need her to make me feel better. I know that Elli cares and he did make me feel a bit better, but it wasn't enough. I need something else, someone else. I need Evie to tell me that it's gonna be OK.
YOU ARE READING
Anywhere, Any Time, at Any Cost
Teen FictionKacey is a quiet, hurt girl, who is also gay. Students at school are cruel and they don't spare her the ugly names and mental as well as physical abuse, which she inflicts upon herself when she cannot stand the pain. But thank god, she's got Elliott...
