Anywhere, Any Time, at Any Cost

Chapter 13: From weird, to happy, to painful

When his lips meet mine I feel their sweetness and passion, but at first I don't kiss him back, because I'm afraid to. It gets more intense and I can't help myself. I kiss him back as he hugs my body with his big arms. But then something wakes me up, a voice of reason screams in my head and I pull away from him and push him away.

His eyes are different than before, they are lit up, full of happiness and hope. I turn away slightly and he says:''I'm sorry, I just ... couldn't help myself.''

I stare at the floor and touch my lips. I don't really understand what just happened and how I feel about it. I know it shouldn't have happened, but in a way it was good. So good. I push the feelings away, turn to face him and say:''This never happened, and it can never happen again, OK? Elliott, I may forgive you, but you know who I am and you know I can't be with you. You know I love Evie. Even if I didn't, I'm still gay and we can just never be together, I'm sorry.''

He nods, but apparently isn't ready to drop the subject and says:''I know, I know you're gay and then there's Evie. But ... K, have you never thought about me in a different way? Maybe you just don't let yourself feel it, maybe you're hiding from it...''

''I'm not hiding from anyone or anything.'' I interrupt him.

''OK, but how do you feel about me? I know that there's more, I can see it in your eyes. The way you kissed me...''

I angrily interrupt him again saying: ''It never happened OK? Look, Elliott, we can be friends, but nothing more than that. Just friends. Take it or leave it.''

''Best friends or just friends?''He raises his eyebrow, intrigued.

''It's the same.'' I roll my eyes and shake my head a bit.

''No, it's not. Tell me, best friends or just friends?'' He smirks.

I hesitate a little bit, but I know I need him. I do love him and he's the only friend I've ever really had. He's been there for me, he's protected me, he's been my rock and I've given him nothing in return. So all I can do now is forgive him, because the good things he's done really do outweigh the bad things or should I say thing.

I look at his beautiful eyes and say:''Best friends.''

We both smile and laugh and then he hugs me and picks me up. We're both tall, but he's taller and stronger.

When he puts me back down I smile and say:''We can be best friends, under one condition. You have to promise me you won't hang out with Ashley anymore. Like never ever again."

He smiles, nods and says:''Consider it done. Never again, not after what she's done to you. You almost died because of her. From now on, I'll only be with you. Anywhere, any time, at any cost.''

I smile and he hugs me again. He whispers to my ear:''It's so good to have you back.''

We spend the whole afternoon having fun, talking and watching movies. In the evening he leaves and when dad comes home I tell him, we're best friends again. He's so happy and he makes us an awesome dinner.

After we eat we play a few games and then he has to finish working on a case. And that's when my day turns from fun and happy to dark and painful.

I'm cleaning the table when he pulls out his files. After I'm finished he puts them on the table and opens them. When I pass by, I notice something. Evie's picture is in one of dad's folders, between some other documents. Without thinking I say:''Why do you have Evie's picture?''

Dad looks at me and says:''Who's Evie?''

I realise what I've said, so I shrug and say:''A girl I met online. That's her. Eveline. Her nickname's Evie.''

I point towards the picture and dad pulls it up.

''This is your online friend Evie? You're sure?'' Dad asks.

I give him a silly laugh and say:''Yeah, dad, that is Eveline Anders, a girl I've been talking to online for the last few weeks.''

Dad looks at me sadly and says:''Honey, this is Jessica Bentley. She's the case I've been working so hard on for the last couple of weeks. She's been missing for about four weeks.''