My Beautiful Disaster

MBD 012

I flipped on the other side of bed and smiled as I saw my little boy's angelic face while sleeping soundly.

Habang nilalaro ko ang buhok nito ay sya ding pag-iisip ko sa sinabi ni Lucho last day when we hanged out.

Men fall in love once but if they do again, it's not as deep as the first one.

I caressed my son's face. Bigla itong gumalaw and reluctantly opened his eyes. "N-Nay.." he called. I smiled when I heard him called me Nanay. It's so unique -- like Momsi & Popsi. Sabi ni Trina -- pang probinsya daw yung nanay -- and even Yu's classmates asks him what is Nanay kasi as if naman na uso ang word na nanay sa France no.

"Shh. Go back to sleep now." tumango lang ito atsaka inilapit ang sarili sa akin atsaka niyakap ako. I hummed as his lullaby.

"I l-love you, nanay." napangiti naman ako sa bulong nito. "I love you more." I answered back and then I fell asleep too.

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I am currently cooking sinigang for our lunch. Kami lang naman dalawa ni Eugene dito sa pent house, minsan dito din nakikitira si Trina with his baby brother -- Kevin -- na kalaro ni Eugene.

"Yu, ready the plates!" sigaw ko mula sa kusina. Nasa sala kasi ito at nanonood ng Ninja Hattori.

Muli ko pa itong tinawag pero walang sumagot na ikinalukot ng kilay ko. I walked towards the living room at nagulat nang bukas ang pintuan ng main door. The television is on. What the? Hindi naman lumalabas ng di nagpapaalam si Eugene ah!

"Eugene.." tawag ko sa kwarto pero wala din ito. I'm hoping he's in his own room pero wala then I end up walking myself through the main door.

Napakunot ang noo ko nang may marinig akong mahinang boses. And then my jaw dropped as I walked myself out of the pent house.

"C-Charm?" nanlaki ang mata ko nang makitang karga nia si Eugene. Gusto kong tumawa dahil parang nanonood lang ako ng past and present version ni Charm pero hindi ako tumawa dahil nainis ako bigla kasi lumabas si Eugene ng walang paalam.

"Nanay, he said he's my Tatay. Is it real, nanay?" inosenteng inosente na tanong ni Eugene.

I end up heaving a deep sigh and nodded. Hindi nakawala sa paningin ko ang malapad na ngiti mula sa mukha ng anak ko. He never seeks for his dad, ever pero ngayon ko lang nakitang ganyan siya kasaya na halata din sa mga mata ng anak ko.

I bit my lower lip as I felt my eyes warmth. "Um.. Yu, go inside first baby -- watch movie. I'll talk to ---"

"Tatay?" Eugene interrupted. Charm is the word that I was about to say pero tumango na lamang ako. Kumikinang ang mga mata nito sa saya. Ngumiti lang ako sa kanya atsaka kinuha sia mula kay Charm at ibinigay nia naman ito ng matiwasay sa akin.

"Yes, baby. Go now." I patted his head. Sumunod naman agad ito na ngumisi pa kay Charm at kumaway.

Akala ko papasok na ito pero bumalik ulit "Tatay, let's eat lunch together here okay?" napatawa naman si Charm at ginulo ang buhok nito at tumango. Humagikhik pa ito atsaka pumasok na.

Tinignan ko pa si Eugene upang masiguradong papasok na talaga nang maisigurado ko ay agad kong hinila si Charm -- medyo malayo sa pent house namin.

"Bakit ka andito?" kunot noo kong tanong sa kanya.

"Sinabi mo naman Case diba na pwede kong dalawin si Eugene. And I did, don't worry, I will never do harm to our son." mahinahon nitong sabi. He smiled at me reassuring me that he's honest. He even caressed my cheeks.

"And.." napakunot muli ang noo kong tinignan sia. "I came here para ligawan ka." Nanlaki ang mata ko when he playfully winked at me and do what he usually does when we were still together -- bit my nose as a greeting.

Humagikhik ito atsaka pumasok sa pent house ko. Wow! Just wow! May pagkakapal din. But I'm just standing -- staring at the door dumbfoundedly at wala sa sariling napahawak sa dibdib ko. Nakakabingi, nakakabingi ang lakas ng tibok ng puso ko.