One Month~ Dolan twins and more Fanfic

Twenty three- Weak

Devin's POV

It's now the next day. I slept with Lexi last night because she couldn't sleep and was so upset about Kian. I have an idea...

I slowly sat up, seeing Lexi sound asleep. I kissed her forehead and got up, silently leaving her room that her and Sam shared. I walked downstairs, finding Ethan making breakfast. I sat down at the table.

"Hey Eth." I said.

"Hey. Want one?" He asked, gesturing to the omelets he was making.

"Sure." I said. I waited a few minutes until he was done and he joined me at the table. We started to eat our food.

"How's Lexi doing?" He asked, not looking up.

"I'd be lying to you if I said good." I replied. He nodded in understandment.

"I was thinking. Why don't we do something for Kian and Grayson? Like a little ceremony." I said quietly.

"I think that's a really good idea." He answered.

"You're probably gonna want to say something...and I know Jc and Lexi will too." I said, looking at him hopefully.

"Okay. I think I could come up with something." He winked. I smiled back. Then Ethan's eyes traveled just behind me. I turned around to see Lexi walking over to me, not smiling, but not crying. Almost like she was emotionless.

"Lexi..." I said, reaching out to her. She looked at me, and I've never seen her eyes like they were. So much pain in them that there was no pain.

"I was thinking of doing something for Grayson and...Kian." I said to her, gently saying the last word.

"Maybe you wanna do something like-" I explained but was cut off by her soft voice.

"-a eulogy?" She asked, her eyes lighting up a bit. Ethan stood up, putting his dish in the dishwasher, leaving us two in the kitchen.

"Yeah." I nodded, with a small smile.

Lexi's POV

I went into my room, already having an idea for what to write. I think this will be good for me, to celebrate his life by talking about all the memories with him rather than being depressed and sad. It's good to grieve though, pain demands to be felt. I went to my room, finding a notebook and pencil. I needed to go to a good spot to think... I wasn't going back to that clearing. I left the room, supplies in hand and walked down the hall to the room that no one had been in for the past 24 hours; Kian's bedroom. I hesitated before going in. The familiar smell of his cologne hung in the air. I sighed and went and sat on his bed, burying myself under the soft blankets. I propped myself up, leaning against the bed frame and a pillow. I put the pencil to the paper and began to write.

Jc's POV (woah bet ya didn't expect that)

"So what do you think?" Devin asked, after he'd explained that he wanted to do a ceremony/funeral/service for Grayson and Kian. I thought it was a great idea.

"It's a great idea. I'll work on a little speech for it." I said, standing up, as did Devin, and we did a bro hug.

"Thank you Devin. I mean that." I said.

"It's no problem man." He said. I walked up to my room, going on my laptop and beginning to write my letter for Kian.

Lexi's POV

I stood in front of the bathroom mirror in Sam and I's room as I looked at my attire; my black ripped skinny jeans, my black hoodie with the LANY rose on it and my checkerboard Vans. It was later, now the evening and it was just about time for the ceremony. I don't get who decided black was a 'funeral' color, but it was pretty depressing, not gonna lie.

"You almost done, Lex?" Sammy asked, peeking her head into the bathroom.

"Yes." I breathed out, as I put the last Bobby pin in my hair that held my messy bun into place.

We walked downstairs and the house seemed so much darker- as everyone was dressed to depress. Everyone was in black. I found Devin, as the eulogy rested safely in my pocket of my hoodie.

"Hi." I whispered.

"Hey baby." He kissed my forehead.

"You look nice." I noted, looking at his black button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up and black slacks with black and white dress shoes.

Everyone suddenly started moving outside. Cameron and Ethan and Shawn had buried Kian in the backyard, close to the edge of the woods. Now all that there was, lied a mound of dirt. About six feet long. As Kian laid six feet under. Everyone sat down in the rows of plastic chairs that were neatly facing the mound.

"Who would like to speak first?" Cameron asked, standing in front of us, looking out at us. I stood up. He went and sat down. I walked to the front, where a podium stood. I unfolded my paper, gently laying down on the wooden platform. I turned around, looking at where Kian laid. A small smile wanting to show. It didn't. I cleared my throat.

"Kian. I'm not sure where to start, so I'll just start with the obvious. Our love was different. To summarize that statement, I was supposed to kill you, but after just a few days I knew I wasn't going to do that. Turns out you were your own killer." I felt a wave of pain go through my heart, but I didn't hesitate to continue.

"You were very special. You told me that 'Before you love someone else, you have to love yourself.' And that really impacted me, which is why I didn't open up to you at first right away but that okay; I was trying to love myself first. You were so genuine. You always wanted to make sure I was happy, even if it meant risking being seen and driving me out for breakfast. You were so protective. Not just of me, but everyone. Whether it was Jc, or the twins, or me, from either James or one of our own guys." A few of the guys laughed at that last part. I smiled a little, looking up at everyone to see all eyes on me, proud ones, sad ones, all eyes. I looked at my paper.

"I found myself falling deeper in love with you everyday. There were so many reasons to love you. You were so caring, insanely smart, funny. The way your eyes would almost twinkle when you smiled, when you would quietly sing, not wanting anyone to hear you, even though your voice was beautiful. But what you said in the hospital yesterday before you passed, really showed your intentions. If I remember correctly, you said 'you deserve to live happily ever after, forever, I love you too much. I couldn't let you go'." I said, feeling a tear slip down my cheek.

"I'll forever take that to heart. I will never forget you, Kian Lawley. I love you."

---A/N---
❤️❤️❤️❤️

-lex