The signs as Old People:
Aries: Screams at you to get off their lawn
Taurus: Has no idea how they lived this long
Gemini: Talks shït about the other grandmas
Cancer: Bakes you Chocolate chip cookies
Leo: Crazy Cat Lady
Virgo: Afraid of Teenage hooligans
Libra: Currently on Match.com
Scorpio: Using their knitting needles as weapons
Sagittarius: Has jokes that can make a stripper blush
Capricorn: Wise sensei ninja
Aquarius: Goes to bed at 7pm
Pisces: Their emojis is a band