Spilled Tea

Unreciprocated

There's this girl and she makes my heart beat like crazy and getting up in the morning so much better. I'll never have a chance with her and that's the thing about liking straight people. You have to be okay with the reality that you are never going to have a relationship with them. You have to accept when you see her with the boy she likes. It's one of those unavoidable burdens that comes with being a girl that likes girls, and it's going to happen. But I think it's also one of the things that many people will never gain. This specific grieving process is something a large part of society will never undergo. Most people can't even begin to understand why having unreciprocated feelings for someone can amount to good things. I seem to thrive when I have that certain someone that makes my day brighter, because they make my heart beat a little quicker. When I don't have that, life can seem somewhat dull. Dealing with the fact that my life will never collide with hers in that way is difficult, but this happens all the time. I may be forced to consistently struggle with feelings for these girls whose hearts are reserved for strictly boys, but when the right person for me comes along I believe that I will love even deeper. The people who can hop from relationship to relationship don't understand what it's like to have a love for someone deeper than the sea and be completely okay that a relationship isn't a possibility. I will be a million times more grateful to be given the chance to be with someone that I love, because that has never happened before. The knowledge of being unable to be with the girl I like is disappointing and really sad, but being given the opportunity to be her friend is something that I couldn't be more thankful for. I love that she gives me that feeling that no one else can and I enjoy just being able to talk to her and be in her presence. I also know that when I'm finally given the ability to be with the person I'm meant to be with, the feeling will be even stronger and something I can't even comprehend right now. I look forward to the day that I finally am handed that chance. Right now, I'm okay with my feelings even though they aren't returned because even just as a friend she illuminates my days. I'll hang on to these feelings until I'm given the ones I'm truly meant to have.