Detachable

~ Chapter 1 ~

''If you want to leave, leave! But remember once you leave this house you won't be coming back. I won't let you step one foot inside of this house, you are a disgrace to this family and have no rights to call us your family or this your home. Do you understand?'' 

My mother kept yelling at me as she was packing my stuff. I didn't move or talk. I didn't have a reason to do. I have already made up my mind and I won't be changing it at all. I am surprised that she is talking to me. She has put me through hell and back and still manages to blame me. I do have a roof over my head, I do have food and place to sleep, but why do those things matter so much if I am not loved, listen to my parents argue and abuse each other from time to time. I don't have any sibling or special bondage with my cousins or other relatives. Am I sad? I don't know how to name this emotion, to be honest. I have felt numb since I was a child, because this was a usual thing for me, not feeling anything.

''I have given you birth, food and everything you asked, but you're still ungrateful. I have never thought I raised you into an unconsidered brat. Your father was right that having a child was a mistake. We started fighting ever since you were born. I even left your father thinking I have to make my child happy, but no matter how much I tried you still don't even try to make me proud.''

She walked out of my room and out of the house, throwing the suitcase out on the street. I was blankly staring at the white wall that had short lines on it, which were measurements of my height. I stopped growing just a year ago. Time sure does pass by. I looked around my room and every moment I wanted to make a happy memory was just being blocked by bad once, making me think, were there any happy memories. My toys are all pushed in a box in the corner that wasn't opened at all and had white dust all over it. My books scrabbled on my desk, showing what I was learning last night.

This is where it ends. From here your free, a free man. No one is here to stop you because you don't have anyone that cares about you. You have pushed everyone away with you depression and anxiety. Why am I like this? Is it my fault? Should I be apologising to other people, begging for apology? Am I late? Should I apologise to her and start to be social and be a different person from today? Will that cover all of the pain that I have from years and years of living? Or should I say not living.

Those thoughts roam in my mind. I made my bed and left my house. My mother was screaming something in the background while I was walking away, but I was so blank that I didn't even listen. The suitcase in my one hand and some pencils, my school id card and of course my phone in other. I didn't look back, not even once. I knew if I did, I would run back in. Back into that hell, that I was so miserable in all of these years. The whole day was in front of me and I didn't know what to do. So I sat in the park and watched some kids play in the sand all happy reminded me of the days I was playing in that exact same sand, except I didn't have friends.

10 years ago...

''Ew, that kid in the sand is so weird, let's go somewhere else!''

''Yeah, no wonder no one wants to sit next to him or play. He is such a loser.''

I was just minding my own business in the sand, my usual place at recess, but once again I was alone and every kid at this park ignored me and whispered behind my back. No one wants to play with me, because I always wear the same thing and because I talk to my toys. But I am just pretending that they are real. I know they aren't. But on the other hand superhero Luise is my best friend and I always tell him my secrets. I don't have that many, but still he doesn't tell anyone. Superhero Luise is the coolest guy on earth. He can do anything: he can kill the bad guys, has all A's in school, all the girls love him, every person loves him cause of his charisma, good looks, brain and muscles, he can even be happy. Something I am not so familiar with. His worst enemy is captain evil. He feeds on people feeling sad and makes them feel like that every single day. He loves to yell and make people uncomfortable. But Luise doesn't let him get away with it.