eddie
waking up the next day was no where near as good as it had been the day before.
after getting home before my 8pm curfew, all i'd done is miss richie. i missed him so much that it hurt, almost like someone was squeezing my heart and refusing to let go.
nothing could make me feel better, nothing. richie was the only one who would be able to take away this aching. not even hurting myself was working today, the stinging in my arm reminding me that i'd already tried that method. things just seemed to be getting worse, and i didn't know how to stop any of it. i was getting weaker by the day from how little i was eating, but every time i tried to eat more than a few mouthfuls of food i just threw it back up. both my arms were now covered in permanent marks, and i didn't even have the energy to care.
what was happening to me?
i was eddie kaspbrak. sure, i wasn't the happiest or strongest, or even the smartest. but i wasn't like this. this wasn't me. it couldn't be.
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two weeks later
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"don't take the cookies! they're my moms favourite!"
i pleaded, cringing as i watched all the food from my kitchen cupboard get stuffed into a bag. me, bill and richie were going down to meet the losers at the quarry, and we said we'd bring food.
"guys, please?"
richie rolled his eyes at me, jumping off the counter and putting a hand on my shoulder.
"i'm sure your mom will live without her precious chocolate cookies, ed's."
i shrugged him off.
"don't call me that, you know i hate it."
once they'd finished raiding my cupboards, i made sure my mom was asleep before leading us all out the back door, praying that she wouldn't wake up. we all began to cycle to the quarry, richie and bill well ahead of me. i was getting more and more tired as i weakly attempted to go faster, feeling as though i could pass out any second. i hadn't eaten properly for so long, i could feel my ribs through my shirt. i hadn't intended on it, but it wasn't something i could stop.
i managed to get there without passing out on the way, parking my bike next to bill and richie's as we went to find the others. i smiled upon seeing that bev, ben and stan were already in the water, jane and mike were sat down on some towels, hands next to eachother as they talked.
"hey guys! come on in, the waters warm!"
called out beverly, splashing ben who returned the gesture. richie looked over and smiled at me before taking off his stupid overshirt and throwing it beside jane and mike. i suddenly felt my face drain of all its colour as i remembered something that made me feel so fucking stupid to forget.
my arms.
there was no way on this planet that i was about to let all my friends see what i'd done. no way.
"ed's, aren't ya coming in?"
asked richie, pushing his fringe back to reveal a pale forehead. he looked gorgeous.
