Hopeless Romantic -- Brallon

{31}

(GET READY FOR A LOT OF eMOtIONS)

BBU

I watch as Dallon reads the letter. His eyes water, and I almost break down myself. Some of our fellow schoolmates glance at us, but decide not to intervene the situation. Who would want to? Two boys crying in the middle of the hallways seems kind of abnormal, but no one would want to get involved. More students leave the hall, resulting in a handful left, including Dallon and I.

A few more minutes pass. Dallon still seems to be focused on the letter, but it's like he's rereading it. His blue eyes scan the paper back and forth, up and down. He is crying now, with tiny sobs escaping his lips. Those little hiccups and the tears leaving his eyes make my heart break more than it should. How is he managing to do that? Looking sad and beautiful?

I hear footsteps scurry behind me. "Dallon! What's taking you so lon-"

I'm slightly shoved forward as Ryan Ross pushes past me and runs to Dallon. I gasp out of disbelief as Ryan glares at me and looks to comfort him.

"Dallon! What happened? What's this?" Ryan exclaims, grabbing the tear-stained paper out of Dallon's hands.

"Ryan, g-go away. I don't need you here." Dallon quietly speaks. "Just l-leave."

Ryan turns to me. "What did you do? Why'd you write this?"

I shrug. "I wrote a letter. Y'know. My thoughts. I couldn't express them verbally, so I wrote stuff down."

He continues to argue. "Why-"

"Ryan, shut up! Go away." We suddenly hear Dallon interrupt. "D-did you not hear me?"

"Um... O-okay. Uh, I'll just leave then." Ryan stammers, and drops the letter to the floor. It lands at Dallon's feet gracefully. Ryan runs away. That was weird of him to do.

I bend down to pick up the paper, but Dallon shakes his head.

"Don't. Just leave it."

"Okay."

He wipes the tears away, and slides his back down the lockers. He seems to be calmer, but I can tell he's dissembling his thoughts and feelings. Despite clearing his face of tears, new ones being to sprout in his blue eyes.

I sit down next to Dallon, and he sighs softly. 

"I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"Everything. Keeping things from you, dating Ryan, being distant, practically lying...."

"It's okay. I understand."

"It's not okay, and you don't understand. I thought I'd be better on my own, but I wasn't. I definitely wasn't."

"It's completely fine. You read the letter, I'm sure we both understand now. But Dallon, please, just tell me how you feel about me. A lot has changed, and I feel like I may not know your intentions anymore."

"I love you. You're amazing. You're incredible. I can't believe it took me so long to realize that. But it took me too long, and it was terrible timing. I really do love you, Brendon. I know that now. And I'm ready. I'm ready to tell you what I've been hiding. It's not even that big of a deal. I'm just insecure about it." He shrugs.

I sit up a bit more. "What is it?"

"I, uh... I have anxiety. Like, really bad anxiety. Sometimes it's so bad that I pass out or throw up. That's actually what happened when you kissed me for the first time." He explains.

"Is that why you fainted?! I'm so sorry! I had no idea that could happen!" I apologize. "I get it now. That's something serious you wouldn't want people to know about."

"No, it's fine. It's just... Ryan used my insecurities to get me to be with him. It was so stupid, too! I should've just told you from the start." He bites his lip. "Ryan said he would tell everybody. Then nobody would want to be with me. Platonically or romantically."

I shake my head. "I still want to be with you. I've never stopped wanting to. I'll love you no matter what. You're not broken, and whatever problems you seem to have, we'll solve them together. Ryan is a sick fuck, and so are his friends."

He laughs dryly. "Okay, I agree.." Dallon pauses for a second. "We're such a mess, though. Even if the mess is partially sorted out, it's still a mess."

"What are we going to do about it?" I question.

"I'm going to break up with Ryan Ross."

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Songs referenced:
Harlem -New Politics
Liability -Lorde
Like or Like Like -Miniature Tigers

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