Jungkook imagines

Let go

(December, 2017)
_______________________
I hated Christmas.

I remember what happened like it was yesterday; I stood in front of a Caffe Bene and smiled as I heard her voice over the phone. Hana was across the street from me and we had promised to meet for our 3 year anniversary, despite the cold weather and all the finals we had to take she still came out to see me.

We were freshmen in college when it happened, I only got to love her for three years; it didn't seem fair to me.

I stood across the street and waved to her. Hana stood at most twenty five feet away from me, beaming brightly as the cold air kissed her cheeks pink.

"I see you babe, don't come yet the light is red."

"I know Jungkook, I know."

I never let anyone call me Jungkook, not even my family members. I acquired the nickname Kookie at a young age and always went by it; my mother told me that I liked the name after hearing it on TV. I closed off Jungkook to someone special to me and that someone special was Hana.

We met as freshmen in high school, she was the first friend I made and the only friend that stayed close to me throughout all four years. My best friend Jimin even told me that she was the first girl who I could consider a close friend. I met Taehyung in my third year, we had calculus together and he was my seatmate for two semesters. He was the one who kept the friend circle together; Jimin, Hana, him and I; the four of us were inseparable. He was also the one who convinced me to ask Hana out.

I graduated high school without regrets; I had a small friend circle, a girlfriend and an acceptance to the university I wanted to go to with a scholarship. I loved life then, I thought everything was falling into place.

The friend circle broke up when college began; Taehyung and I both went to Seoul University for dentistry while Jimin went to Korea University to major in medicine. Out of all the acceptances, Hana chose Yonsei Academy. She wanted to be a teacher.

We all had plans to go different routes and though we were in different schools, we lucked out because all of our schools were within the same city.

I remember leaving class to have lunch with the guys and all the occasional "sneaking out" dates I had with Hana. The first two years of college seemed great; it was the third when everything fell apart.

Taehyung's family suffered financially and even though he was able to attend school, he was buried in student loans.

Jimin's father passed away and it was best that they move to the United States. His aunt was there and moving to California was the only way he'd have family around him.

Then there was us, Hana and I.

It was finals week of the first semester, we promised not to get anything for each other this year. We celebrated our anniversary on Christmas and thought there would be more years to come.

On Christmas day the first snow fell. Hana loved the snow, it doesn't snow as much as she'd like here and I promised that one day I'd bring her to the ski resort in Hokkaido, Japan. She always talked about it; saying how much powdered snow there was and how so many people enjoyed the crisp cold air.

I knew we didn't have a lot of time on that busy day, I remember telling her we'd sit down in a coffee shop to settle our minds and escape from the thoughts that reminded us of our exams and all the upcoming assignments that were to be due.

I stood in front of the shop and waited for her, she was the easiest to spot in a crowd. I saw her in an instant as she approached the corner of the street; I couldn't help but smile and blush because every time I see her it's like the first time I laid eyes on her.