The Sweetest Devotion (The Affair Series Book 2)

What Sons Think

STEF POV

"Mom is 6 times 8 68?" I heard my son ask after I had just gotten a text from Lena saying she was in San Diego and needed a break from us. Well, there was a break in general from us, and it was all I could do from feeling something.

Truth was, I didn't want to feel a damm thing, and I had no intention of calling her back right now. If she wanted a fucking break I'd give her one and it wasn't the first time. 

It wasn't and just as she was tired of my anger I was tired of her changing her mind when it came to us. Either she wanted me or she didn't.

"Mom you ok?"

"Yeah babe I'm sorry was just stirring this soup."

"You sure? You look upset?" Jude asked walking over to me and gently resting his hand on my arm.

"No I'm ok baby. And 6 times 8 is not 68.  I think we need to do those flash cards again yes sir?"

"Ahh. I guess. I had a brain fart." He giggled heading back to the kitchen table as I smiled at him.

Right now I was grateful my son was with me for he prevented me from doing something stupid like drinking myself half to death and smoking another pack of Newports.

I had already gone through a pack after I overhead Frankie's conversation at the diner the other day which was still swimming around in my head.

All of me wanted to help her and tell her who I was but I just didn't know how I would do it or how she would respond.

Pouring the tomato soup in some bowls along with the grilled cheese sandwiches I took a seat across from my son as he smiled wide at me and digging in.

"Looks good."

"Aww thanks honey."

"So mom?"

"MM?" I asked taking a sip of my soup.

"When will we visit Callie again?"

"Well sweets next week. She earned back some of her privileges and they are having a family day. So as long as she behaves we can go."

"Is she going to live here when she is done with her program?"

"I don't know baby. It's um, its up to Callie."

"But can't we make her live here? Maybe she will get use to it."

"Ah yeah love. I wish but...

"I know. She doesn't want to be with you. Why does she hate you so much? Is it really because of what happened when she was little?"

"It may be many things love. Some I don't know I mean I will always try with her because she is my little girl but I can't force anything with her.

I can't because I don't want to do that to her. Callie deserves to have a choice as long as she makes good ones. No she doesn't always but I hope she will.

She may not make good ones living with me but she may make good ones if she lives with someone else babe."

"Diane?"

"Maybe." I said taking another sip of soup and letting out a small smile. It was no secret that the last few months had been very hard on Jude for he missed his sister very much.

 I tried to take him to visit her as much as they would allow me but it was very limited to certain times and Callie had lost her privileges many times.

"Why don't we all just live together?" He suggested as I let out laugh.

"Oh sweets sometimes life doesn't go that way. Ya know? Diane and I aren't together anymore baby."