I'll Be Okay (Mayday Parade Fanfiction)

Resolution

I lead Derek to my room. When we walk in I spread my arms in welcome. My room is pretty unorganized. There is always paper on the floor, paper consisting of sketches, unfinished stories, poems etc. I spent most of my time in my room. It was where I felt safe. The messiness was my home. I move so papers our of the way and throw them into my desk drawer, crumbling them in the process. Derek gives me a puzzling look and then shrugs it off.

"What?"

"Nothing," he smiles. "You just have a ton of paper."

"I write a lot, okay? I just never finish anything.." I trail off looking from his eyes to the floor.

"Why not? I'm sure it's great."

"Maybe. I dunno. I have no faith in it. It's like I know people will hate it."

"So. Who cares what they think? you shouldn't. If you love to write, then write. Write about what you want. It's their problem if they don't like it."

I can't help but blush and smile wide. Derek seems to do the same. Soon it becomes an awkward silence. We haven't spoken of the kiss we shared on my stairs. It was a spur of the moment thing and I regretted nothing. But his lack of words worried me.

Derek walked over to the large shelf of music I had on the far wall next to my bed, and strained his neck to look at the CD's that I owned.

"Wow. There's some great stuff here. Blink-182. My Chemical Romance. All Time Low." He looks over at me taking his attention away from the shelf. "I'm so happy right now." He chuckled.

And with that we put in a CD and laid on my bedroom floor. We didn't speak so I stared at my ceiling. My mind started wandering. I don't understand how I can feel so nervous, yet so comfortable around someone at the same time. It's an odd feeling that I wish I could shake. I'm not sure if this a good or bad. And I'd hate for Derek not to feel the same way. And what does this make us? What was that kiss? Was it just nothing? Or...?

"What are we going to do?"

Shocked that he spoke I turn my head towards Derek.

"What?"

"That kiss. I felt something and I really like you. And I hope you feel the same way. It's just we've only known each other for hardly a day and we're basically best friends.." He trails off.

"Well, then lets be friends for the meantime. If we happen to end up something more then so be it."

I've never felt so jittery in my life. I've never felt so connected to someone. I've never wanted to kiss someone so much. I've never wanted to hug someone and never let them go as much as I do now.

"I better go. My mom will wonder where I'm at."

He stood up and helped me to my feet, yet again. And I followed him downstairs. We embraced each other at the door and he walked out. Looking back at me, a lopsided smile spread across his face as I closed the door.