Redemption [3]

Picnic Dates and Plans

Just warning you things are going to get rocky for Ella and Nate.

"Nate, you don't have to do all of this?" I gesture to the picnic we're having in Central Park.

"I'm your boyfriend Elle, I should be doing this and more. I grabbed your favorite quiche from that French restaurant with a refreshing strawberry lemonade and to sweeten your tooth more a chocolate tart from your favorite bakery." I can't help but admire all the treats Nate brought for me. I lean over to kiss him.

"Nate, this is perfect. When you asked me for lunch I thought something near campus. I never thought it would be this." I gesture to all our food.

"Yeah, and I thought this was a good time to talk about what happened between us at Blair's wedding." I knew this was coming. Honestly, I wanted to talk about it earlier but Nate kept avoiding the conversation. He wasn't ready to deal with me asking him why he dismissed me so harshly that night and didn't give a damn about my worry over Blair.

"What would you like to talk about?"

"About me wanting to spend time with Lola instead of searching for Blair with the rest of you guys." Seriously, he wants to talk about Lola.

"What's there to talk about her?"

"Ella, Serena talked to me about your apprehensions with me."

"van der Woodsen is dead to me! She should not have told you. And the amount of times I keep secrets for her and she goes about telling the world my issues. She is toast when I see her back at the apartment."

"Ella, don't' be mad at Serena. I'm glad she told me."

"Why would you be glad? I basically told her I feared you were bored with me and could possibly cheat like you've done before. How could that be good for you?"

"Because it showed me what you were feeling."

"I'm an open book Nate, I don't hide my facial expressions well you can tell when I'm upset and..."

"But I can't know the reason why. Ella the next day you had movers come and pack all your things out of our room. You never told me you found a place and..."

"I'll give you that it looked bad that I moved out the next day, but it honestly a coincidence that I was able to find the perfect penthouse for Serena, Blair and I to live in. We needed more space and I needed to be closer to the Upper East Side."

"But you didn't even call and tell me. I had to answer to Ms. Bass has us moving her things if you have any questions contact Ms. Bass. What was that about?"

"You know I was swamp with meetings with Gina about the right project for me to make my debut back into fashion. I needed the right thing to show everyone that I'm alright. I had to also schedule a meeting to talk to a grief group of mothers who have gone through miscarriages. I was busy..."

"That's the thing, Ella, you're always going to be busy."

"Nate, you've known this is my life since I started molding. What's going on with you?"

"Ella, the past couple of months have been hell for us. I've stood by your side as you grieved over the loss of your baby and helping to recover. I've been there and soon you'll be gone and I'll only get to see you maybe once a month and that's if I'm lucky."

"What do you want me to do? I love modeling and I've worked hard to get where I'm at. I don't complain when you spend hours at the Spectator all day!"

"That's different."

"And why's that?"

"Because I'm actually doing something for a living that actually matters." It stung hearing this from Nate. People have always seen modeling as less than it really is. It's not all about posing pretty for a magazine cover here and there or walking down a long catwalk adorned with the most decadent fashion in the world. It's a brand. One where I can empower the next generation to reach for their dreams and never let anyone tell them they can't do it. I'm building a platform for myself so I can make a difference in the world. Because of my presence in the modeling and fashion world I've gained influence over other power individuals who can help make a difference.