Reckless Behaviour (Exo Kai)

Acceptance

Chapter 34 – Acceptance

Kai

I clench Jina's hand in mine as we stood at the doorway to one of the lounging areas. There was Suho, Chanyeol, Baekhyun and Chen, along with a few other girls and guys from different groups and staff.

The whole room stared at us as we stood there in awkward silence. I fucking hated this. There was nothing I could do to protect my girl. I could literally see the judgment dripping from some of their expressions.

I let go of Jina's hand to pulled her close to my body, turning her around to face me.

"You still sure you want to do this?" I asked, lifting my free hand to brush her hair behind her ear, totally giving a blind eye to the group of people watching on. I was dying to carry her out of here and tuck her safely in my car before I came back and dealt with this mess but I knew it would be futile unless she wanted me to do so.

"Look behind me Kai." She wrapped her hands behind my neck and leaned back slightly so she could look up to my face. "What do you see?" I did as she asked and saw the mixture of sympathy, disbelief, disgust, envy and desire on the faces around. I could deal with all the others but it was the last one that had me tensing with anger and possessiveness. "I know you are worried about me but Kai it's you, you have to worry about. It's you I'm worried about because I've had what seems like a life time to deal with these judging looks."

"Come-on." I tightened my hold on her and guided her into the empty room next door, not caring once again about our audience but I needed some time alone with her because the look on her face was fucking devastating.

"Kai." She started while I closed the door behind us. "I'm never going to be normal." She sighed with resignation and it dug a pit in my stomach. "I would walk into a room of people and one of your friends would casually slap my ass because he'd seen me at a strip club he visited recently." She walked closer to me while I stood frozen in the middle of the room, my gaze clouding with anger as I tried to imagine what she was describing. "Another would ask me how much it would cost him to fuck me for a night." An involuntary growl of fury left my mouth as I tried to keep my calm. "A girl would call me a whore. Tell me how much I don't deserve you. Ask me what tricks I used in bed to keep you with me." She walked closer and leaned forward hugging me to her. She rested her chin on my shoulder, her lips level with my ears, her breath tickling my neck as she opened her mouth and shattered my heart to pieces with the realization of how fucked up life was for her. "And you know what Kai? They aren't even wrong. I am all those names they call me and more. Just now, I saw your friends looking at us and realized that I needed to make absolute sure that you know how really shameless and immoral I am and how I have been living for the past few years."

"Jina." I tried to stop her because I knew she was going to fucking shred me with what she was about to put me through.

"No Kai please. Listen to me. Once I've told you everything, if you still want me then I will be yours, I will only ever be yours." She gave me a sad smile that had my chest clenching.

"Ok. Fine." I knew I was scared because I wasn't sure whether I could bare listening to all the crap the girl I love had been through but I knew I owed her this much.

Look for the silver lining. I get through this and she would be mine forever.

She held my hand while she walked to a corner of the room and dropped down to the floor. I sat right beside her waiting for her to start.

"The first time you saw me it was at the club. You saw what I was doing. I've been this way since I was sixteen. I still remember the first time I did it. I was so scared but worse was my embarrassment. Before that no one had ever seen me naked but then I had to be naked in front of all these people and they touched me Kai. They squeezed my nipples, pinched me between my legs. I was so naïve then. It's still unforgettable to me. I was so close to being raped that night because I didn't know how to seduce some one out of actually wanting to have sex with me." She paused, shuddering at the memories. "Rian reminds me of what I used be when I first started."