Claudia Styles Dirty Little Secret

Time To Leave The Past Behind.

Time To Leave The Past Behind.

I’d managed to escape Taio and Usher all night, and I was doing a pretty good job avoiding them now. 

Most of the party goers left last night, but some stayed, crashing were ever they passed out. 

After the little fight scene I had actually managed to enjoy myself, I danced with Josh, baby sat Rose, had a few sneaky drinks, won most of the drinking games, and just had a ball with those I call family, except one… Louis.

He had never reemerged from his room, was I worried? Yes, Did I leave the party and end up enraging him more? No. I knew he needed space, I guess the news must have been pretty hard on him, even after the way we left things. 

I had stayed up most of the night just chatting with Josh outside under the stars, but he had to call it quits at about 5 in the morning, which just left me by myself outside watching the sun come up, it was chilly but I didn’t feel the cold, strange I know but I guess after everything that has happened my body doesn’t react to much anymore.

“Still up I see?” A voice chuckled from behind me, a voice I knew to well, 

“Couldn’t sleep” I shrugged, as he sat down, while one handed me a cup filled with tea. 

“Claud, your shaking, why aren’t you wearing a jumper you must be freezing.” Niall scolded placing a warm hand on my upper arm. 

I looked down at where he was touching me and low and behold I had goose bumps all over me, and I was slightly shaking and yet I couldn’t feel anything. 

“I don’t...I don’t feel cold” I admitted, my eyes diverting back to my cup of tea. 

My eyes glance in his direction, and I could have laughed at his facial expression had it been funny but it wasn’t, his mouth was slightly hanging open, his eyes wide in shock, his eyebrows creased together. 

“Your joking me right?” He was serious, but so was I no joking about it. 

“I wish I was, and I’m not just saying this because apparently I have depression but lately I just don’t feel things… thats crazy I know but I just….don’t” As if to prove my point, the icey ocean winds blew in, leaving Niall to shake in his jumper while I sat as still as a brick wall, still only in the dress I wore last night. 

I watched as Niall stood up pacing in front of me, I could here him mumbling, actually no it was louder the mumbling but I just couldn’t here the words he was saying, I knew I should have been listening because he was speaking to me but I just couldn’t here him. 

“For fuck sake Claudia snap out of it!” He cursed, crouching down and shaking me violently. 

“Why!” I hissed pulling away from him, “This is a good thing, the more I shut everything off the easier things are, don’t you see nothing is going right anymore” Standing I picked up my cup and ditched it at the tree

“ Iv’e lost Uncle Sci, Dad, Louis, Lillie, and it will only be a matter of time before you realise there is no point sticking around! It will be easier on you all if you just leave now Niall, the sooner you all leave me alone, the sooner I can get this dying thing over and done with” I hissed clutching my stomach and dropping into a crouch. 

“Oh for fuck sake were back here again are we? When are you going to get it threw your fucking head that people care for you! I care for you, Josh, Zayn, Harry! Are you forgetting about him? Your brother who has only just gotten his sister back what do you think he is going to say when he finds out the shit your saying” I scoffed covering my ears with my hands, I wasn’t in the mood to here his lies.