MY WORST FEARS (Completed)

CHAPTER 1

I gasped for air the twentieth time that morning trying to catch my breath as I stood and took in the view of the school that would bore my dreams. The school that I've dreamt of joining and now the dream was a reality. The sun shone directly Infront of me, casting shadows of the grill where I stood. Few students walked passed me through the metal detector. I heard solid and repeated audio tones and I turned to the security guard who stood with a Garrett on the on the other side.
I smiled at him and was taken aback when he smiled back. Have met serious stone cold security guards that didn't bother to say hi while running their gadgets on you. But this one, smiled. I don't know but I felt my spirit rise.
"Welcome to Murang'a University of Technology. Are you excited to join your new school?," His voice was warm and sweet as his smile.
"So excited..," it didn't bother me that he knew right away that I was a new student. With his sweet personality, he must have known everyone around.
"I'm sure you'll love it here," the security lady next to him motioned with her Garrett to inspect my bag and I opened it for her. The stone cold security guard I always saw in many entrances. She pawed inside my bag as if looking for something specific and when she failed to find it, she gave it back and motioned me to walk forward.
"Have your first great day girl," the smiley security guard said.
"I'll see you on your way out and I'll be excited to know how you liked the school,"
"I sure will tell you if i see something exciting. I'm...," He raised his index finger before I said my name.
"Not yet. You'll tell me your name when you find something you like around. Deal?," I couldn't help but smile. Such a sweetheart. His family must be proud to have him.
"Deal," I turned away and faced the entire walkway surrounded by gigantic trees. The sun was now partly hidden by the canopy trees that casted shadows on the concrete pavement, and I walked under the co-joined hands of the trees like a bride walking towards her bridegroom. Mowned grass, different coloured flowers that scented the aisle, were positioned as my best maids, and through a sidelong, I could see them cheering and acclaiming me. Finally, I was going to marry the love of my life. Not a single day I didn't remind my sister how much I wanted to join campus. And to join Murang'a University of Technology to be specific. And to pursue Bachelor of commerce. This is all I ever wanted. And finally my chance was here.
As I walked through the seething corridors to the accounts office, I realized how I had acquired something I always admired. I just couldn't place my fingers on it.
The school was much bigger with buildings scattered around the school compound, which I assumed were classes for different courses. The view of the green grass and different coloured edging plants along the pathway made the school more captivating.
I didn't have problem locating the accounts office, as I had been there before to pick my admission letter.
I entered in the accounts office where almost every door was closed. There were two doors on the left. One of the door on the far side was enclosed written 'the chief accountant' clearly stating keep off serious business only.
The other door was open, the same office I picked my admission letter. The lady who attended for us last time was nice and I hoped to find her again. I decided to walk in and hurrah! There she was. This time I had a chance to greet her as the last time she had been busy attending to us.
She was the only one in the cubicle office. The other three tables were empty with neatly arranged files on the desks. The exact kind of life I wanted after school. Working in an office, only that I only wanted my own office where I wouldn't have to share with anyone. Someone pulled me from my thoughts and I turned to her. Her smile elated my heart and I stepped closer to her desk.
"Good morning. Oh I'm sorry I...how are you? Ummh! ", I greeted her. She actually winked at me. She had beautifully held her sunny hair in a bun and surprisingly she had no make up on. Her skin acne free I almost reached to touch it's softness. It's true what they always said, all secretaries are beautiful.
She must have really worked hard in school to get a great job like this. It's literally the kind of job you can't get hold of if you don't have either good connections or good grades oh and beauty but by the look of how she carried herself, she was an intelligent one. Obviously her wits got her the position. And she definitely was beautiful.
"Hello, you must be one of the new students reporting today, congratulations you're the first to arrive ", thanks to my strict mum for chasing me out of the house so early in the morning.
"Hi, it's nice to meet you, again," I said and she looked up at me, clearly shocked.
"Again? Have we meet before darling? Sorry I can't recall...,"
"No, it's okay. Of course you wouldn't have noticed me. There were so many students for you to attend to." This time, her lips lined with a smile and her recollection didn't fail her.
"Oh, darling. We must have met when you came to pick your admission letter. I'm sorry, I couldn't remember you from that day. Oh, I was really plunged with work around the office and had to complete that day. And plus i had to attend to you beautiful people," she heaved a sigh as she placed both her hands on the desk and zerod in on me. My gaze fell to the ground and I regretted my attempt to get her attention.
"But I'm certain that I'll never forget to those rheumy eyes darling. You're such a sweetheart."
"Umh! Thank you...," I faced downwards again, almost tempted to draw lines on the floor.
"I..i...came to drop my receipt before heading to my first class, but I really don't know my way around the school. If you could help, maybe with a map...", I said hoping I wouldn't have to walk in circles around school looking for my class the whole day.
"Which course are you talking?", she asked and I was happy to respond.
"Bachelor of commerce ", she smiled at me proudly. If she had a son or daughter, they must be proud to have her as their mum.
"There's the timetable. Listen, I'm not allowed to give right away but I don't think it'd hurt to give to you. I'll connect you to somebody who'll show you where the first class is situated. Just seat right there on that bench" , as I was turning back, a guy came in rushing to the lady and frantically placed some paper on the table. To my surprise, the lady smiled but the guy seemed less amused.
"What is this stupid report they sent on my mail. I thought I finished the stupid job last semester." I could feel the ground vibrating on my feet as he spoke.
"Now they have to make me work this semester too. This is bullshit ", the receptionist wasn't shaken at all by his outrageousness. She kept arranging some papers on a file a smile glued on her face.
" you know there's no way I'm going to help you with that...", she took a quick glance at me, smiled and looked back at him clearly enjoying the show.
"But... on a second thought, maybe if you do me a favor, I can see what I'll do", she smiled at him. I watched his shoulders relax a little bit before she continued.
" my new friend right there needs to find room 104. If maybe you can take her there and come back, I'll help", she smiled again. One look from him, I knew it was a wrong idea.
He glanced at me and my stupid legs automatically stretched in my raising position. He tracked me up from my toe, his eyes shifting from my waist up till our eyes connected. He raised one corner of his lip with a scowl on his face.
The guy was handsome. That's all my mind managed to wrap up.
His black dreads loosely held with a black band. Some few fringes on his forehead. This made his eyes sparkle. For a moment, I stood there staring at the cute face staring back at me.
"You think I'd even want to be seen walking around with such a nerd? You must be joking and I don't like it abit", he chuckled and blew some air. I felt like I had been slapped on the face. Nerd? He just called me a nerd. He turned back at the receptionist and my hand automatically held his hard and big biceps and turned him towards me.
I wanted my hands to stick there savoring at the brick body under my palms.
"You just called me a nerd? Why? You don't even know me", he rolled his eyes before opening his big mouth to talk.
"I don't need to know you frump. Just move away from me and stop talking to me" , my eyes pricked. I could feel them begin to water and I didn't want anybody to notice. This guy didn't even know me and he was already insulting me. What the hell did I do to him?
" I'm not a nerd. Why would you even call me a nerd?", My legs debilitated and I almost fell on the ground when I felt two hands shore me up. The secretary stood behind me and when I turned and saw her smile, I remembered my sister. The guy tore me from my thoughts when he continued talking,
"Seriously, have you looked at yourself on the mirror or you don't have one? Were you aware you actually joining campus or you need someone to define the meaning of that word to you? She will..", refering to the receptionist. She was still standing behind me, rubbing by hand. My whole body shook to the core and I knew she was aware of how his words affected me. She turned me towards her and wiped an imaginary tear, or an actual tear, k wasn't sure. My whole body couldn't move from the shock.
"Listen darling, you're beautiful and this guy is an idiot. Don't listen to him, okay?," I couldn't help but nod like a two year old. He broke our conversation again when he spoke,
"Now where Were we? Oh you doing something about that crap work thingie they've written in my report? " The receptionist turned to him clearly pissed. She chewed on her inner cheek contemplating on what to say to him. I still stood there, like the nerd he called me. Really I felt like a nerd and most especially because I didn't know what to do to him.
"You stand there and continue barking thinking I'll lift my finger and help you, because I won't. Not unless you do what I tell you. Take the beautiful lady to room 104 and come back, but before you do that, I want you to apologize", he turned to me then to her clearly not exactly what he was expecting.
"excuse me? I do what?", He laughed then suddenly turned serious. "Tabitha, you say what?",
"Mmh!",
"You want me to apologize to this nerd? For what? Telling her the truth? Is that a wrong thing to do? I only said the truth", he laughed again turning to me.
My eyes were starting to water this time and I couldn't let anyone see me crying. He called me a nerd and the fact that he continued saying it on my face hurt the most. I rushed out to I don't know where hoping I didn't have to see him again.
Ever.
My meekness raced before words proceeded my mouth. Whenever somebody would insult me, I'd let the anger seave through and manage to convince myself that they're just rude fellas not taught enough manners by their parents. I know most of them is not the parents to carry the cross, but there must be someone to blame and who's better to do that than them?
I walked through the corridors praying that I wasn't lost.I made a few rounds before I looked up at the next room at the end of the hall and saw room 104.
I released a breathe I didn't know I was holding as I stood at the door looking for a seat. My eyes landed on this Caucasian skinned guy, and for a brief moment, our eyes met. He gave me a smirk and his hazel eyes shone in a spark. He wore sloppy cobalt blue bottom up shirt and a raven khaki trouser with a pair of black converse. I noticed all this as I wound my way to the seat next to him.
He was seated on the first row exactly where I always preferred sitting in class. At least someone had a bit of taste as me.
"The seat is already taken," the guy said without looking at me.
"Oh okay. I'll find another place to seat," I started to walk at the back when he spoke again.
"Sorry, but I think you must be lost. This ain't bachelor of commerce class. It's the next door from this class," he still hadn't attempted to look at me yet and there was not next door from the class I was at.
"Wait a minute, how did you know I'm taking bachelor of commerce? Did you...," He pointed at the paper on my hand before I completed my thought.
"I'm just wondering, how did you get the receptionist to give you the timetable? Things don't happen like that around here," I cramped the paper in my bag briskly before anyone else could notice.
Tabitha, as that rude had addressed her, was kind to me I didn't want to put her in trouble.
"By the way, the seat is not taken. I was just pulling your leg. You can have it,"
"Well I don't want your girlfriend to come and embarrass me in front of everyone because I've taken the seat you've reserved for her. I'll just look for somewhere else to seat,"
"Come on. I already told you the seat is not taken just like me. I'm single, unless you don't want to seat here with me because you're afraid your boyfriend will see you seated next to me,"
"Im not taken...," The words were already out before I thought of what I said. I looked around to make sure Don wasn't in the vicinity to hear what I said so loud.
"And before someone else asks you this...",
"Sorry, I don't know why I lied but I have a boyfriend. I'm taken, so please don't ask me out," he laughed and pulled the seat for me.
"Relax. I wasn't going to ask you out. If you don't mind, I'd like to show you around the school maybe after classes.. maybe hang out and get to know each other", it was more of a question than a statement. I liked the idea. Besides I didn't mind to have a new friend.
"I don't mind. I'd like that", I said taking the seat.
"And.... don't worry. I'm sure you'll get a better guy here who will make you forget about your high school sweatheart," my eyes automatically darted from corner to corner making sure that nobody heard him. Don would kill him for merely talking about me with another guy. I couldn't even think of it myself.
"Why would you say that? I told you I'm dating and my boyfriend is not in high school. He's in campus, Kenyatta university," I took peek at the door, incase Don decided to enter through the door and find me talking about him with a complete stranger.
"So why would you date someone you don't love? It doesn't make any sense,"
"Will you keep it down? I'm not talking to a complete stranger about my boyfriend. So stop trying..," he broke the silence with laughter, his shoulders moving up and down as if dancing to a favourite song.
"Oh, please forgive my lack of proper manners." He retorted, standing up.
"My name is Vicky Njenga." He stretched his hand towards me and I couldn't help but respond to his courteousness.
"I'm Laila Njeri. I'm before you start again, I'm not talking about my boyfriend. Pleasure meeting you," a scowl married his face as he took his seat next to me.
"Oh my you must be so unlucky. Don't worry, I sure you there are different guys around here that you're going to meet, especially one called Hellzel. He'll definitely catch your attention," my mind jogged back to the guy at the accounts office. I shook away the bad thought hoping that I'd never have to meet him again. The school was big enough for us to cross paths again.
His warm smile encouraged me to have a little chit chat with him. He turned towards me, his left hand rested on the armchair supporting his chin. I wished my sister could see me that time. Making friends. He told me more about the school and what happens around the school on weekends. Not forgetting the freshman party that happens after three weeks of joining school.
I knew I wouldn't join, so I didn't bother to ask what goes on in the party.
My eyes shifted to the door, anger drenching me like ice, as i watched trouble come in class. Walking towards us. My heartbeat rate increased, lips trembling when he stood before me.
Ugh!
His figures jammed in his front pockets, thumbs protruding. How did they even fit in there? Why do men even wear skinny jeans? What's there to see?
I tried to calm myself down before he'd notice how much effect he had on me. He didn't say a word or rip his eyes off me, and I didn't know what to do.