Who Knows?

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My side is aching,
But this view is breathtaking,
This loving figure standing over me,
Their eyes wide, what do they see?
Do they know I'm faking?

Motionless, eyes glossed over,
Not as lucky as a 4 leaf clover,
Yet being called beautiful,
It would be worse if it was meaningful,
This ride being as rough as a rover.

My hands twitching,
My body itching,
My teeth grinding,
This grip binding,
Is there any holy stitching?

Windows cracked open,
My skin is prickling frozen,
The grin of despair,
To choke on more than air,
I'm not one of the only women. 

Holding me back from my dream,
Telling me it's not my theme,
Courage drying up,
Like water in a cup,
My blood is thinner than cream. 

My intestines are squirming, 
But the hand guiding me is firming,
Pushing me forward,
Harder and onward,
My hair is storming.

Bones bleeding through,
Paper skin bruised by you,
More body spasms,
Burning leaking chasms,
No one even needs a clue. 

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