Thoughtful Rhymes

My Comebacks

Not all of these are going to be amazing. I only did this because I was bored. The first one is actually true. Everything else has to deal with quotes on the internet that people wrote, thinking it was amazingly smart when I just think it's dumb.

Basically, I was talking to this guy who told his friends he's usually nice to everyone. I looked at him in a sassy way and said "mmhm" with an eyebrow raised. What he said wasn't true, but he said "I'm usually nice to everyone, but you. You're rude." I responded pretty rudely.

"I wouldn't have to be a bitch if you weren't such a whore." Later, while we were still fighting, this guy (I'll call him weirdo) came up to me and said "Whip it out!" He was hiding behind 3 people because I'm known to be a bit extreme and rude.

I said "Why don't you whip your dick out and cut it off? You're better off a pussy anyway." I was so annoyed, which is why I said it. That's it. I'll show you the other come backs. They won't all be amazing.

Hater: I couldn't help but notice that awesome ends with "me" and that ugly starts with "u."
Comeback: I couldn't help but notice that slut has a "u" in it and that that's exactly what you are.
Another comeback here is using their name against them.
A- Asshole or Accident prone
B- Bitch
C- Cunt or Clingy
D- Dick or Dumbass or Dense
E- Egotistical
F- Fat or Fucktard or Fucked
G- Gassy
H- Hot mess
I- Idiotic or Imbecile​
J- Joke or Jackass
K- King of Dicks/Assholes/other rude remark
L- Larva (they're disgusting)
M- Morbid or Mad or Monkey looking
N- Numbskull or Neurologically challenged
O- Opium addict or Occasional (rude remark)
P- Pussy or Poor or Prince of (rude remark)
Q- Questionable or Queer
R- Ratty or Rocky or Rick's Dick (from Rick and Morty, it should be old and saggy because of his age)
S- Shitty or Sucky or Slutty or Sloppy
T- Tiny or Tricky or Tragically​ (rude remark)
U- Ugly or Undesirable
V- Vagina or Vacuum of Drama/other rude remark
W- Whore
X- a Xerox used for porn (they won't know it's a copy machine)
Y- Yucky or Yapping
Z- Zero Worth
Example: If their name is Fiona call her a Fucking Idiotic Occasional Numbskull who sucks Ass.

Hater: Don't call yourself hot. The only thing you can turn on is the microwave.
Comeback: Don't call yourself pretty because your titties are itty bitty. (This only works for some people. Don't say this if you're flat.)

Hater: Zombies eat brains. You're safe.
Comeback: Vampires drink clean blood. Yours is too dirty. (If you want you can add in Mudblood, but then you'll sound like a certain someone. ;) )

Hater: If you're going to be two faced at least make one of them pretty.
Comeback: If you're trying to be cool/new at least say something original.

Hater: I'd beat you up but that might be considered animal abuse.
Comeback: I'd insult you but that might be considered too incomprehensible for you.

Hater: I'm not short. I'm just more down to earth than most people.
Comeback: I'm not tall. I'm just more connected to god than most people.

That's all I could come up with right now. Bye Bye!