Waiting For The End. (Complete) (EDITING )

Time and life.

Did you know that when you live almost 24/7 with a person you really get to know the other person like yourself? Sometimes, more than your own self.
Joni and I lived togheter , sleep togheter, cook, eat every meal togheter, breath togheter, trained togheter and even study togheter. That's a lot stuff for doing it with another thinking self, I know. But separeted way, after a while, it did not work.
So, when things started go from "oh that's weird" to "hell no, he needs to talk and talk right the hell now" I was scared. Panicking kind of scared.
For someone who loved laugh all the time, this days get a smile was a miracle.
The last couple of years I started to think he had a secret, I understood why he decided to shut, even to me.
But for 2 entire weeks, joni looked like the entire world was on his shoulders.
He barely kissed me, or hug me or even looked at me.
I'm not a tact person, so when the only human being on earth with who I had physical contact is not contacting you at all, I started to panicking.
I started soft, quiet, with some question here and there....
Ok, not my moves, I'm not sutile. Conversation was more like:

-hi, sweetie! Can we talk while you drown yourself in coffee?

-oh...ummm... sure, I still have time before school.

-right... seat down. It's an emergency.

-don't you tell me I forgot your birthday? !

-now that's it! My birthday was 9 month ago, we went to a Linkin Park show, and school ended a few weeks ago. Now, that being said, start talk in dude or I'll make sure you found naked girls pictures in very compromised situations until you die!
I'm very worried at this point, you asshole, if we had a puppy I'd start crying my way to dehydration because the way you are acting can be compared to the death of a puppy- I can work my way to drama, is my specialty.

-why would you said that? I'm good, just lost in my head, you know I have a lot to think about. I want to study but there's a great chance of me joining army, and I want to be a prospect this year for the mc if I don't choose army. Plus, I had an invitation of the gym to join amateur fighting.

-I know all that Jonathan, but that's not it. You are not just lost in your head, you are just completely lost, like a ghost or something.

-I didn't noticed that way, but thank you for the great picture, honey. A ghost? Really?
-oh come on! I menaced your well covered gayness and you don't even blink. Shut up you glamour diva!

-shit! You knew I'm gay? How? Did you tell dad anything? Please tell me he still has no idea, I can't get into the mc being this way.

-what? Are you serious? What way? Homosexual? What's wrong with that?

-what's wrong with that? Are you being serious?

-can we stop asking no sense question? I feel in a bad propaganda.

-you are right in that picture. Sweetie, the thing is, that being gay is not a match to a riding club. A macho riding club. And I'm thinking about reject the academic proposal of the full scholarship on sports so I can go to army training this year and end all this.

-sure! How did I not reach the conclusion that getting kill and maybe not to be ever find in one piece again was the solution to everything? !! Look joni, if you want that, I'll just go to get my .38 and shoot the hell out of you and is easier. Maybe, I'll just shoot you anyway in the head and try to make you understand that what you are saying is wrong, IN SO MANY LEVELS. Here, wait a second.... I'm putting extra bullets just for you dumb ass.

-Dallas! Shut up! What you want me to do?

-I just want you first, talk to me ON TIME . This could be solved before. Second, I want you to stop thinking all that bullshit and start to work again as a functional human being. Look joni, you love to fight, you want to learn about psychology and you love to ride. You were born to ride and to fight. Army is not for you. You are free and love it that way. You can still be a prospect this year. Im sure if you talk to the family they wont even blink about your sexual orientation.

-maybe, but I'm not ready to talk about it. Look, I met someone. I really like him. But I can't feel free around him, because i can't take the words out of me.

-oh, dear Mr Davidson. That's good! And if you are not ready yet... then don't do anything but you don't leave everyone here to bury your head in sand. Show me some balls and take the right decitions to you.

-you are right, again. Don't make me tell that again in at least a decade. I'm going to training now. After this I need to think.

-good luck sweetie.
(I decided to make him tell me I'm right as often as possible)