>>lost<< Yoonmin

XXV

Jimin and I stand in silence for a long moment, his gaze burning into me. I feel like he sees behind my mask, behind my eyes and forces a small, uneasy smile to his lips.
"I know."
He says it quietly, defeated.
I shake my head slightly, turning to lean back against the counter. A pressure in my back pocket catches my attention and I gasp, startling Jimin a bit.
"I came here for this."
I recall quickly and pull the wallet from my back pocket, holding it out to him.
His eyes widen a bit as he takes it, opening it and flips through its contents quickly.
"Guess I left it."
He mumbles and I nod, watching his expression as he searches.
"All there?"
I ask, eyebrows raised as he looks up at me.
"Ya."
He reassures and smiles at me. I return the tense smile and inhale deeply, recalling the conversation with Jin earlier.
"Jimin,"
I say his name, barely more than a soft exhale of breath that passes my lips. He looks at me curiously and I grab his hand in mine quickly, before I can change my mind. Before he can pull away.
I have to tell him.
The words catch in my throat, threatening to strangle me as we gaze at each other. I'm shaking, and he raises his brows unsurely.
I pull his hand closer to me, cradling it in both of mine. He looks at me questioningly, and I nod reassuringly to myself, forcing the words past my lips in a rush.
"Jimin-ah..."
I squeeze his hand gently, then pull it closer to me, holding it tenderly over my heart. He tenses and I keep my eyes downcast, letting them wander to his warm hand.
"I... really like you."
I grumble, forcing the words out before I can change my mind.
He is frozen, staring at me with big, timid eyes.
The silence stretches on between us, my anxiety building with every passing moment.
"Jimin."
I whisper, begging him to meet my gaze now, but his eyes remained trained past my shoulder. The anxiety slowly builds into panic, and I flatten his palm over my heart, trembling violently.
"You can feel it right? My heart?"
I ask, my voice raising slightly. I can hear how desperate I am but push it aside, wanting him to simply meet my eyes so, so badly.  I squeeze his hands, finally pulling his eyes to mine. Water builds in my eyes as I stare into his, blue and deep, an entire ocean existing within them. Swirling and empty. They are so empty.
"Jimin please."
The first tear escapes my eye, eliciting a reaction from him.
"Yoongi..."
His voice is trembling too, but he reaches up and clumsily wipes the rogue tear away, letting his fingertips brush over my cheek before his hand drops back down to his side.
"Please don't cry."
He grumbles and brings his face closer to mine, forcing me to stare into those swimming, watery eyes.
"I have a girlfriend."
He whispers painfully, pulling his hand from my grasp. I reach from him, fumbling but finding a grasp on nothing as he steps back.
"Jimin she doesn't deserve you. She's hurting you."
I plead, stepping towards him but he takes another step back.
"She's all I've ever had."
He chokes out, tears flowing freely from his eyes now, making my heart clench painfully. I reach out again and his back has hit the wall, nowhere left for him to go.
"You have me now."