Jin returns to the counter triumphantly after I tell him the drink is really good. It is a chocolate mocha, whipped cream swirled perfectly on top.
I sip the drink for quite a while as the time ticks on. Few customers move in and out of the shop and it is peaceful. I return home after a while, taking the long way as I work off the energy the sweet drink gave me. When I reach home I am disappointed by it's drawn-out silence so I turn on quiet music as I work on the new photos on my laptop. They have turned out well and I will definitely enter them for this month as well.
The dull night ticks on, filled with mundane tasks and mundane food. I don't sleep well, but toss and turn throughout the night, not fully awake but not tired either.
The rest of the week ebbs on all the same. Sometimes I spend my time in the cafe, once I went to the store, but mostly I laze around my apartment. I drift from place to place and try to occupy my time and my thoughts but nothing seems to work, so I've given up and just float constantly. Sometimes I drift with my camera, down the sidewalks, hoping for anything to catch my eye; sometimes I drift around my house, room to room,wall to wall, just keep moving; and sometimes my mind drifts lazily as I lay in bed, but sleep is too far away. I haven't been able to grasp it well recently, and when I do manage to reach it, my fingers only graze it and I capture it for a short amount of time before it drifts away again.
Has life always been this empty?
Have I just now realized?
Or is life just full of the emptiness?
Meaningless words and questions float around my brain with no answers or meanings to any of them.
Finally I'm too tired to drift, so I settle into places and simply stare, on the verge of sleep but never tumbling into it.
I've never wished for sleep so badly.
I think to myself and heave a sigh, realizing I haven't eaten as I should be either.
Maybe that is why I feel so weak.
I wonder at the fatigue that holds my muscles. So I eat but never feel full, the food flavorless as it touches my tongue.
Everything is so dull, so empty, and I feel lost in this foreign world that was once my home.
YOU ARE READING
>>lost<< Yoonmin
Fanfiction"I want to be something to you. I want to be your everything. But how am I supposed to be anything to you when I am only a skimmed-over paragraph, chapters and chapters behind where you are now? How will you find me, lost in these words and pages of...
