"I hate-no dislike you a thousand times that you may never feel because of that thick wall of ice around your heart. That thick ice that no one might break because no one cares to even change you. Like they said, people don't change after 24 hours."...
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twenty - three - she misses him
*
Upon seeing the article; I dropped my phone. I crouched to grab my phone when I noticed someone took it and handed it to me. "Are you crying Funneh?" I looked infront of me to see Evan. I snatched my phone from his hands and sent a glare. "Stay away Arden." Even with his name rolling off my tongue; I could still remember him. Evan apologised to me which was slightly weird. I walked home with tears evident on my face. All I just wanted was these feelings to end! It was freaking killing me. I couldn't control my feelings.
I hear the door unlocking as I quickly jumped into bed and pretended to sleep. I couldn't deal with their useless worries right now. "She's asleep." I hear a soft mutter from Kyran as he slowly closes the door. I glance at my phone and to see that Lizzy texted me again. .
from: Lizzy
it's all rumours. just some crazy fangirl..
I quickly wiped my tears. For some reason; a sigh of relief passed through my quivering lips. The feeling that I had been keeping inside for the past few days — pain, desperation. I had been paining for help. For everything that I can grasp on. I had been feeling alone all along. My feelings for Alec weren't worth it. Everything wasn't worth it. I just wanted to be the same again. To be joking around and stuff. But of course; life had to do it again.
The light shined brightly as the door opened again. I shut my eyes tight as someone patted my head, it was Gold. "Funneh, I know you're awake. You don't sleep in one place. Just so you know." I faced Gold and hugged her tight. Gold further more did not ask me what was wrong. But with Gold; all seemed to roll of my tongue like butter. "I miss him, you were right Gold. I like Alec. Now I just broke this supid friendship that I didn't even notice existed!" Tears rolled off my eyes like acid.
My eyes were red, sore and just. . a mess. Gold patted my head continuosly. "If I could've told Alec that a certain girl misses his quirks, she misses how cocky he is, how playful he was towards her, no matter how many sides he was she still liked him. Why are you getting beaten up on a stupid article?" I didn't know how Gold knew what happened to me the past hours. "Don't . . tell . . Kyran." I barely could've muttered a sentence, I was panting and crying at the same time.
"He knows, and it's okay."
That why Gold is the best unbiological sister that I've ever had. She understands my struggles, my worries, my everything. She is a part of me that I will always treasure. Gold is the best. I slowly start to close my eyes and sleep in the arms of Gold.
*
I wake up in my bed as I sigh. I checked the clock to see that it's 12:03 midnight. Remembering what happened a while ago; I sigh in despair and lay down on my bed again. Evident with a frown on my face. I'm so embarrassed to say this. . but Alec, oh god! Stop making me miss you.
You irresistable prick.
He didn't do anything wrong. It was all my fault. Always my fault . My fault for Elisse's tears, my fault for Alec and I's seperation, my fault for the pain that I felt for the past few days. I just want to laugh with Alec again.
God dammit Alec; where the hell are you?
Since it was super dark now. I hear the door again as someone approaches me. I was guessing that it was Kyran. A more muscular and built form. Kyran hugs me as I hug him back. "Kyran why are you here?" I ask him as he stays in silence for a while. "Shh," Was the only thing that he muttered. It didn't really seem like it was Kyran. He played with my hair. I was tired; so I closed my eyes while Kyran was playing with my hair. I was maybe just tired of all.
"Why are your eyes bloodshot red, why were you crying princess?"
