Still Here [Fillie]

The Weekend

Finn's POV

I woke up this morning in my clothes from yesterday. My eyes were all red and puffy do to me crying myself to sleep. I held a framed picture of Millie in my arms. I miss her.

But there is no way she could be gone, I saw her yesterday at school. Maybe if I stop thinking about her I won't cry today. I just need to pretend that she is here.

My eyes fall down to the picture in my hands. The young British girl I love has a flower in her hair and a smile on her face. "Good morning Millie." I crock out. No response. My eyes water again and I shut them quickly to prevent myself from shedding one.

I held the photo close to my chest and let a sob escape my mouth. I'm so weak. Millie is alive. What if all of last night was a dream?

A knock comes from my door. I open my eyes to inhale then let out a long breath to calm myself. "Come in." I spoke, my voice had cracked. The door opens and I see my mom come in. She was holding a bowl while having such a warm smile on her face.

"Good morning, hunny. I brought you breakfast." Mom approaches me holding out the bowl. I don't move or look up at her. I appreciate her trying to make me feel better, but I don't want it right now. I just wanna be alone with Millie.

Mom puts the bowl of whatever on my nightstand beside my bed. I hold the picture of my crush closer to me and let a single tear and fall down my face. Why does this hurt so much? At least she's not gone forever.

My mother sat down on my bed near my feet and started rubbing circles into my back. It soothed me enough to let out that one breath I've been holding in since she walked in.

"I know you're upset about Millie. I just want you to know I'm here for you. If you need to let out your feelings or wanna talk about anything, I'm right here in the house."

It feels nice hearing my mother say that. It's sort of comforting. I do have a lot of feelings built up inside of me that I need to let out. I just fear that my mom won't like these feelings and will punish me for having them. So I guess I'll just hold it all in at my best.

"Also, I understand if you need some time alone to mourn over... what happened." Mother adds delicately. I sniffle and try to steady my breaths. "Thanks mommy." I whispered almost inaudibly.

I felt my mom lean over and plant a kiss on top of my forehead. She stood up and left, but before she shut the door she told me she loved me. I was to weak and weary to respond. I'm sure she knows I love her too.

After mom left, I was alone with my thoughts again. I really thought this weekend would be fun. Instead I start my Saturday off crying over the girl of my dreams.

Damn it, I try to pretend that she's still alive and that she's out there, but it's hard. No, I'm sure she's alive. Millie Bobby Brown can't be dead.

I just wish she was really here in my arms. It's difficult holding this picture in my hands. It's not really her. I want Millie, I need her hear with me.

"I need you."

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Sorry for the short chapter. Next week will be a flashback. I think last week I promised a flashback, but it's actually next week.

So obviously Finn is depressed about the death of Millie. He's entering the first stage of grief.

Can anyone guess what the first stage of grief is? If you do I'll give you a shoutout in next weeks chapter.❤️