Star Wars Imagines

I Remember | Finn

imagine: Your past isn't the only unexplainable thing about you, you feel a strange emotions towards a stormtrooper you hardly interact with. The time comes when you have to make a choice, take the chance to flee the First Order or stay loyal. Your decision is hard but it becomes the right one. 

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I've never been able to remember much of my past; As soon as you're admitted into the First Order Academy, your mind is wiped and you are succumbed to their propaganda against the resistance and the republic.

I wasn't admitted for fighting. It was customary for a woman to be trained for commander and general positions, instead of combative ones.

For the past 10 years, I've had occurring flashbacks and short snippets of my memories. It was strange to me that this one dark-skinned boy was in a large portion of these.

Along with these memories, I also felt a strange pull to a random stormtrooper. At times, he would randomly appear in my mind and would never leave my thoughts. I never worked up the courage to talk to him, I never knew what to say, I didn't know what this was. The strange part was, the stormtrooper would always act strange around me as well.

"Admiral [y/l/n]." a gruff, deep voice spoke, causing me to flinch as my thoughts were interrupted.

"What is it, sir?" I responded.

"General Hux has asked that all admirals evaluate trooper abilities and submit the report by tomorrow."

I nodded and turned back in my chair to face my holo-screen.

"Oh, and Phasma has other responsibilities today, she has asked for someone to evaluate her troops as well."

I gave out a quiet sigh at the sight of all the work that needed to be done. I pulled up my map of several storm trooper corps and looked through their progress reports. I had little suspicions of defectors and my notes were short, something the commander would enjoy as it meant less work for him. 

Next, I sorted and looked through Phasma's corps, FN. As I was scrolling through I noticed a trooper who looked familiar. I watched his training and saw he was a skilled fighter, but his uncertainty raised concern in me so I flagged him. However, his appearance intrigued me and I moved through his profile. Suddenly, my mind made the connection and I recognized his face from my memories; although his features evolved, his structure was surprisingly similar. His trooper ID was FN-2187. I realized how unlucky he was, the other members of his corps were not so kind to him, likewise Captain Phasma. 

 The door opened behind me, I quickly dismissed the profile and continued writing the report. 

As I clenched and unclenched my fist, to stretch it out, an officer snickered, "Can't handle the work?", while walking past my desk.

I shot an angry glare back at the officer as tears brimmed my eyes. It wasn't the first time I had been mocked, it actually happened quite frequently. 

Today was my early day, as I would be able to leave and return to my quarters just after lunch. I left the room distributing holo-messages, eager to finish my work.

I decided that I would give being brave a shot as I walked down to the mess hall to grab food, however I forgot to take my cardigan, which usually helped conceal me from my tight uniform.

I was met with hollers, cat-calls, and whistles, groups of men were trying to get my attention. I grabbed my food at record speed and fast walked out of the room.