confessions to jake

chapter thirteen

~14th June~

Dear Jake,

I'm so terribly fascinated but also afraid of humans and it's all at the same time. I'm afraid of myself too, more than anyone else. I've hurt myself so badly throughout my life and caused more pain to cancel out everything else going on with me, do you understand how that feels? How you spend your life trying to run away from what hides inside you? I feel like I can never get a break from it all. When I'm not hiding from people, I'm hiding from myself. It's scary how controlling people are, they try to control who people fall in love with, whether they feel ready to have children and how they want to live their lives when in reality choices are made to determine where your life is headed and that is nobody's business but your very own..