Make Me Breathe! (Completed)

Chapter 21

Clara's POV

I inhaled and exhaled continuously but the feeling couldn't get out of my stomach. Crazy I know.

I've been happy since when I left that hotel parking. Happy because of many things.

First of all I'm happy that Jack told me the truth that he liked me. I told him the same since it was so clear that even the blind could see. No need to hide it.

I was also happy that I had such an effect on him. I made him weak and weak by teasing him more and more. I didn't know he can be such vulnerable. And that what is making me smile foolishly every time.

It's has been only 4 hours since we parted but I miss him like shit. So much that it eat my heart that he is not around. I want him more than anything but I know I've to wait until he initiate everything. I regret my actions and how we I've slept one month ago. How I wish we didn't sleep. But we were done with it long time ago and we can't erase it.

I'm happy that he was sorry for hurting me. I know that he felt guilty.

But I've many questions running on my simple round head.

What did I do to hurt him, like seriously he told me that he was hurt by'a certain girl' who turned to be me. But I absolutely don't understand what I did to hurt him. I've tried remembering anything I did but it's in vain.

I just decided to keep it for a while and I will ask him some time later.

Another bothering question I have is this. I'm I worthy to be his girl ?

I'm almost like prostute , I've spread my legs to many men and I feel totally cheap. Why is he insisting on liking me when I'm totally a jerkass ?

I've ruined my body with alcohol and different men until I feel hatred to myself. I deserve only bad things. Honestly Jack doesn't deserve a girl like me, he should wait to have a better girl who will treat him better.

A girl with a good past. Not a rotten girl like me.

Oh God forgive me.

Why is he in love with me ? I've only shown him hatred and nothing more. Even today I didn't hug him nor kiss him like he deserved but he insist that he want me.

Why ?

I'm also disturbed by who he is, like is he rich or poor ? Why was he working in that big restaurant ?

By the way his house looked when I was lastly there a month ago. He doesn't look like a struggling student. But why did he work as a waiter for Christ sake. That question need some answers.

How will Tiana react when she realize that I'm accepting to be someone's else girl ? I know she will freak out.

She will be surprised but happy at the same time.

I need to completely change. I don't want to be the same girl I was few hours ago. I will change completely. I'm rotten but there is hope for a better future.

My phone vibrated signaling that someone was calling.

I checked who it was only to see Sarah crazy appear on the screen.

Oh shit ! The party.

"Hello, " I received the call and greeted her.

"Lara are you coming or must we come for you ?" Sarah shouted on the other line.

I didn't feel like attending a party but I know my friends will get mad at me if I happen to fail them.

"I'm coming girl, " I said.