note: dA. "If You Only Knew ~Cilan~" sad
If you only knew, I'm hangin' by a thread, the web I spin for you.
_____ stood perfectly still, staring over the glistening lake at the sun that was slowly sinking behind the horizon.
She wishes that her love was with her, to spend this beautiful moment with her.
Memories start flooding her mind.
If you only knew, I'd sacrifice my beating heart before I'd lose you.
A small female who looked of only the age of nine was standing on the sidewalk, looking around for her friend. Where was he?
"Momma, can I go look for Ci?" she asked, looking up at the twenty-two-year-old.
"Yes, darling. Just don't get hurt, okay?"
"I'll try, momma!" And she ran off, a few seconds later seeing her friend cross the street with his other two brothers and their father.
"Ci!" she yells, stopping for a second to rest her legs.
"-possiblenickname-?" the green-haired ten-year-old said, turning around.
His brothers and father crossed the street.
And the light turned green.
"Cilyan!" _____ yelled, running and tackling him out of the way of a car.
She ended up in the hospital the next day, after having a long talk with Death.
I still hold onto the letters you returned, I swear I've lived and learned.
_____ sniffled, rubbing her eyes.
How many letters did she have?
Only five. She remembered every word of them though.
It's 4:03 and I can't sleep, without you next to me I toss and turn like the sea.
_____ rolled over onto her right side, then her left.
She flopped over on the her stomach, turning her head to look at the clock.
It read 4:03 in bright red numbers, a little dot right by the letters AM.
She sniffled. How long had it been since she had a bed-buddy?
If I drown tonight, bring me back to life, breathe your breath in me.
She started crying, turning and burying her face into her pillow.
There wasn't anything she could do but hope.
The only thing that I still believe in is you, if you only knew.
She kept waiting for him to return.
Her precious Cilan... How was he doing? Did he still like her?
Did he miss her too...?
If you only knew, how many times I counted all the words that went wrong.
There were over fifty.
Over fifty words that she accidentally said. Why did she say them, though?
_____ couldn't exactly remember.
If you only knew, how I refuse to let you go, even when you're gone.
_____ wouldn't let him go. Never.
She needed him. Why did he leave, though?
He liked adventure, and different tastes...
Why couldn't she understand, though?
I don't regret any days I spent, nights we shared, or letters that I sent.
The female sat down at her desk, picking up her pencil and grabbing a piece of paper.
She started writing, about having no regrets about anything they did together (which does not include doing those things, if you people were wondering).
It's 4:03 and I can't sleep, without you next to me I toss and turn like the sea. If I drown tonight, bring me back to life, breathe your breath in me. The only thing that I still believe in is you, if you only knew, if you only knew.
She sniffled. This was her... Oh, how many times was it?
Her tenth time shedding tears.
She tried not to, but she couldn't help it.
If you only knew, I still hold onto the letters you returned. You help me live and learn.
She slipped the last letter she obtained into the desk's drawer, the other five still innocently sitting there.
Her eyes caught the oh-so-sharp letter opener.
Should she...?
No. She couldn't. Because what about Cilan?
He would be disappointed in her.
It's 4:03 and I can't sleep, without you next to me I toss and turn like the sea. If I drown tonight, bring me back to life, breathe your breath in me. The only thing that I still believe in is you, believe in is you. I still believe in you. Oh, if you only knew.
She had sent him a package.
Why had she done that?
Sighing, _____ slowly lied down onto her bed.
~~~
"Oh, Cilan. Someone sent you a package," Nurse Joy said, stopping Cilan from leaving with Ash and Iris.
Confused, Cilan walking over to the nurse, taking the package and leaving, slowly opening it.
Hey, Cilan. I thought I should send this to you... I'm not really sure why.
I have a lot of questions for you, but I don't know.
If you only knew...
Inside of the box was a half-empty bottle of a green-colored liquid.
The Gym Leader paled slightly, not answering when Ash and Iris asked him what was wrong.
—
guys it was poison