Wrong number // jenzie (complete)

^Chapter 18- part one^

I walk....rather was pushed, into the dressing room. Here goes nothing.

Today is the day. Today, the gang is going to the party. I'm pretty nervous that I am going to fuck something up. But, Maybe I should do a short recap on what all happened the past couple of days, eh?

R E C A P
Annie and Ruby picked me out a bunch of outfits. I'm not gunna lie, those outfits are pretty fucking scandalous. I'm just not really used to those tiny of tops. After the whole mall thing that day, I got layers in my hair so it 'wouldn't look so boring' as Annie said. I'm happy that both the girls are helping me look more attractive. Maybe I'll impress Johnny more. Anyways, the rest of the day was pretty uneventful. The next 2 days were passed by playing bored games and watching movies. Yesterday, all of us when out for dinner but that was it. During the dinner I sat next to Johnny, of course. Honestly, it was great. I literally love everyone here.

**Ok recap is now over**

I was in the middle of a great dream, until Johnny had to wake me up. "Come on Kenz. It's time to wake up." He said in THE SEXIEST, SLEEPY VOICE EVER!!!

I smiled a little without opening my eyes. John starts to play with my hair to get me up in a more peaceful way. Eventually, I open my brown orbs to see Hayden, Ruby, and Annie walk into the room to see what's happening with me and John. They literally have been doing this ever morning.

Annie whispers over to Hayden something, I could get out these words, "I didn't realize they were this cute."

She said something else after but I couldn't hear. "Get out!" I say while stretching and leaning up from Johnny's chest. It was nice and warm there. I didn't want to get up, but I had to.

They all laugh and turn off there phones. Before walking out of the door Ruby says, "We're going to collect all these pictures and videos together and make something great with it." She still sounded cute, I couldn't be mad at her.

I look over at Johnny, who is looking back at me, and smile. "You seem to me smiling a lot more... is everything ok?" He jokes.

I giggle and slap his arm. "Shut up." I say in a fake, hurt voice. He just rolls his eyes and pushes me into the shower. "Come on, I know you like to take the first shower out of the two of us." He said while turning on the water for me.

I smile at him, again, as he walks out the bathroom. "There's that beautiful smile again." John says while closing the door. I could barely hear him... but I did.

I pick the song Red Roses by: Lil skies.
**here is the song is you need it. Strong language! ummm also lil skies is like HOT AFFF sooo Yeah**

After my long-ish shower, I blow dried my hair. I didn't put on any makeup yet because I'll do that when we have to get ready for the party.

I look at the time on my iPhone: 11:24am.Ok, I have plenty of time. I simply change into a pair of grey leggings and a pink 'culture' hoodie from the Migos album.

**of you don't know what the hoodie looks like, I would advise you look up what it looks like**

My feet carry themselves out of the bathroom, all the way down to the living room. There, sitting on the couch, was Johnny and Hayden, the girls were sitting on the large chair, and John's parents must be in the basement.

I sit down next to Johnny, with Hayden on the other side of him. Hayden gives him a look, but he just ignores him. John looks as if he's trying to ignore me, also. What did I do in the last 20 minutes? I tried saying "hey" and giving him a smile, but he just looked at me and looked back at the wall he was starring at. Maybe he's having family issues, I'm not sure.

I've had enough guessing. I need to know what's up. "Hey, Johnny. Can I... talk to you for a second. Alone." I was having a hard time getting out that sentence but I finally did.

John and I got off the couch and went into his room. "Why did you, all of a sudden, ignore me?" I ask —with a sigh— also while plopping down on his bed.

John just rolls his eyes and laughs. I don't understand what's going on with him. "It's nothing Kenzie.... at least nothing about you. You're innocent." He says while sitting down next to me.

"I- I'm confused." I stutter. What could he possibly be talking about.

"That's why I said 'you're innocent' " he put emphasis on the innocent part. He sounds upset... very upset. "You don't even understand what Annie and Ruby are doing to you." John was quieter this time around.

I give him a face that says, "I don't understand a fucking word your saying!" I also add a little head tilt into that shit. Annie told me it looked cute when I did that. "Just, please. Tell me... please." I whisper to him while grabbing at his hand.

Johnny pulls his hand away quickly and gets off the bed, that the both of us were (emphasize that word 'were') sitting on. "Mackenzie. Annie and Ruby told me and Hayden what they were doing to you. Trying to manipulate you into a doll. Dressing you up in tiny fucking outfits. Making you think that your too fat to be eating the food you were eating before- you haven't even touched a back of Takis since the mall day- and we literally have 2 bags because, as you know, Hayden loves Takis too." John paces around the room.

I didn't even realize. "Well, the girls told be that Takis will make me fat... and then you won't like me." I say, trying to give myself an excuse...I don't think it worked.

He pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs, very loudly. "That's what I am talking about Mackenzie! You only listen to what 'Annie and Ruby' say!" He yells this time. I broke him. I think as something starts to form in my eyes.

I feel wet,warmth falling down my cheeks. Tears. The things that fall from your eyes when your sad, happy, or hurt. I've never understood tears. Why do they form when I'm laughing too hard, but also when I'm on the verge of crying.? Why do they make me feel like I'm giving up, but also make he laugh even harder when I can make fun of myself?

"I'm sorry, Johnny." I say while more teary wetness falls down, all the way to my neck.

"Why can you just... UGH... I don't know. I just want you to be yourself Mackenzie Ziegler!" He yells back at me.

This time, I'm speechless. All I can say is "I'm sorry." My mouth stays open but nothing comes out. Tears are still falling right into each crack and crevasse.  I don't know what to do anymore. Actually I do know, but I can do it. All I want to do is curl up with John. I want his body to make me feel safe, not.... insecure. Insecure about being myself. Annie tells me that I need to stay in shape, do something cute once and a while, and make sure to be a lady in front of John. But John is telling me to eat more Takis and be myself. The problem is... I don't know who I am anymore. Am I the girl who is a lady around men? Or am I the girl that everyone can talk to, but still has a 'bad girl side'? Am I the girl who loves to eat junk once and a while, and can be comfortable around guys? OR, am I the girl who needs to stay in shape and be healthy? I don't know any more.

Well what about the things Annie made me do... but he said he liked? I think after my 'day dream', that had to of lasted 3 minuets at the least. "What about my hair?" I ask John as I wipe tears off my cheeks. "Annie told me that I should cut my hair so it wasn't so boring. You said that you liked my hair."

John nods his head, slowly. "Yes I did say that. But, hair can grow back. It takes a while to un-starve yourself, now doesn't it." He says while sitting back down my me on his bed.

"John.... who am I-" Well I guess I should be asking him who he wants me to be... right? "Well, who do you want me to be?" I continue.

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Guys don't worry, you won't have to wait long for the next part of this chapter. I'll make sure to update the second part later today. I hope you enjoyed this deep ass chapter. Don't forget to vote and comment! 💕 (1535) words.