Is He... Gay!? (boyxboy)

Chapter 18

*JAMES POV*

*Picture of James after incident*

Nothing.

That's what I've been feeling ever since I got to Grant's house. When I stepped out the shower and looked in the mirror, I knew there was nothing left. 

I did nothing to deserve this, yet it happened anyway. If I say I was straight or gay, for some reason I'm still a fucking magnet. So hey, why should I care about what else might happen? 

Why should I keep this charade up any longer? Why should I care about anyone else or anything?

For some reason, I can't even seem to care about myself. 

I put on the clothes that Grant gave to me and walked back downstairs. 

I flench when I hear glass shattering.

I walk into the kitchen and see Grant there with his hands on his head. 

I sigh, knowing that this lump of cuteness is crying cause of me. 

Like, he doesn't even try to hide his feelings for me and think I really don't know? 

Grant, baby, I feel it too. I feel it so much. 

I walk towards him and place my hand on his shoulder. The touch of his skin warming me instantly. I bite my lip, being this close to him drives me crazy. 

I run my hands through his hair, ignoring all the thoughts in my head telling me not to. 

"Grant.." It comes out as a whisper while my lips are next to his ear and he groans. 

I wrap my arms around his upper arms and rest my head on his shoulder.

"This... this has nothing to do with you. You couldn't have saved me, okay? please, do not think you can protect me or save me or... love me. I am my own person. You are perfection... don't let me destroy that.", my head is buried in his shoulder and there are hot tears running down my face. I hold him tighter, knowing that when I walk out of this house, it will be the last time I see Grant for a while. The last time I see anyone for a while. 

I'm pulled into his lap and he's holding me in his arms. We're both crying and I can't stop. 

After a few more minutes, he finally sits up and stares at me. He has snot on his lip and red eyes. I smile at him, knowing I probably look the same. 

"Grant, I don't know what you've done to me, but whatever it is... you need to stop.", I say caressing his cheek. I can see the pain in his eyes from my words and my heart wrenches. 

"I can't James. I can't stop wanting you. I don't know why but ever since I saw you, I had a magnetic pull to you and I don't think it's going to end anytime soon.", He says in a whisper. I can tell he's trying to hold back more tears.

"It has too, Grant. This... These feelings, they have to stop.", I sigh and get off his lap. Me being so close to him isn't helping at all. 

He reaches out for me, but I don't come back. I stare at him from the other side of the table. 

He stares back. 

There's so much emotion in his stare. I can see the pain and the anger in his eyes and it hurts me. 

I need to get away from him... to keep him perfect. To keep him the same way he was when we met. Not this broken shell that I created. All of my friends deserve to be the better them without me in their lives. 

I need to go.

"I'm leaving Grant." I finally say, trying to put some force into my voice and gets up to leave. 

"I'm sorry that it has to be this way, I can't imagine how you feel right now and I wish I could make it-" 

His lips are on mine in an instant. I groan and fall into the kiss wrapping my arms around his neck. This is going to be the last time. I might as well enjoy it. 

I throw myself into the kiss with no regrets and let it take me. I'm drowning in this bliss but I know I'll have to come out.

And when I do, I'll never be able to feel it again. 

We stand there and kiss for I don't know how long. 

And I really don't care. 

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What Do You Guys Think Is Gonna Happen In The Next Chapter!? Like Whaaaaat!

*Eats pizza* Whoever's Writing This Story Better Come Back With Something Good. 

;3