truly, teddy ✔️ [unedited]

106

dear ivo,

it's awkward writing this while jake's looking over my shoulder but i have to get all this out. and if i don't i will surely forget what i wanted to tell you.

[jake just read that paragraph and said he'd give me some space. he's becoming more and more like a friend, not a doctor]

okay. here it goes. i don't know why i'm so nervous writing this, i mean, i'm never going to give these to you. so why is my heart speeding up and my hand is shaking while i'm writing this?

i miss you. that's what i wanted to say. i miss you i miss you i miss you  i miss you  i miss you. i miss the way you would looked at me [granted, you now look at carine that way but i still liked how you used to look at me like i was the only person in the world]. i miss the way your smile rubs off on people and they find themselves smiling too. i miss your stupid jokes and your trying-to-be-serious face you always had while saying them. i miss you, ivo.

do you know that they say it's love if you like the person for more than four months? i've liked you for the whole school year; ten months. i think it's safe to say i think i love you ivo.

and it's stupid the way that everything works out. it's obvious carine doesn't love you the way i do. i know it's selfish saying that ivo, but i just can't help it. she doesn't know you the way i know you. and i'm not saying that that's the reason why she doesn't love you as much but, seeing how long you guys have been together, wouldn't she at least know what your favourite colour is?

truly,

teddy