73 Memories

The Thirty-Third Memory

When you got out of building three, we walked back to your dorm room, where your roommate was playing some game on his phone. "Hey, Andy," you said, and the scrawny boy looked up at you. " I hate to do this, but I was wondering if you could go down to the waiting area for a little? We have to talk about something." You gestured toward me with a confused face.

Andy nodded and got up, stretching. "No big deal. Later man." He clapped you on the shoulder and left the room, leaving us alone.

After a few minutes of silence, you sat down on the bed and patted the spot next to you for me to take. I did. "What's up?"

I sighed. "There really isn't an easy way to say this."

Your eyes got wide. "You aren't like- breaking up with me or anything, right?"

I was quick to ban that thought from your brain. "No, no! Of course not! This is kind of, well, kind of really serious, though."

I watched your posture stiffen. "What?"

I fidgeted with the ring on my right hand before I spoke again. "I just- I don't really know how to say this."

"How about with words? You're driving me crazy, woman!"

I smiled slightly at your comment but ignored it besides that. "Just give me a moment."

I know you wanted me to tell you right then, but I also knew you could tell this was serious, so you nodded and kept quiet until I spoke again.

"I'm pregnant."

Your head whipped towards me so fast I was worried you'd given yourself whiplash. "What?"

Immediately I felt scared. "I'm sorry! I... I just-" you silenced me by pressing the palm of your hand to my mouth. 

"No, no it's not your fault. "Takes two to tango, you know."

I laughed nervously and gave you a small smile, appreciating that you were trying to make light of this horrific situation. "What are we supposed to do?" I whispered.

"What do you mean?"

I sighed. "We're in college. We're young. I don't know if you'll change your mind about me, or if I'll kill the kid, or-" again, you cut me off.

"Do not ever say that! You are not your mother, okay? You need to stop thinking you are. Her brain isn't yours, okay?"

I nodded and then busted into tears. "What are we supposed to do? We don't have money, and we don't have jobs or a house. But I don't want to kill it."

You sighed, rubbing my arm. "What do you want to do?"

I wiped under my eyes before answering you, doing my best to keep my voice steady. "I'm scared that I'll be like her, I really am. But I also know that once I see the kid, I wouldn't be able to give it up. So, if I choose to keep it, will you be there for me?" I closed my eyes tight, preparing for rejection, but not receiving it.

"I'll be there for you through thick and thin. Hell or high water. I'll love you no matter what you want to do, and I'll spend the rest of my life with you, no matter how much you want me to leave."

I smiled at you brightly. "I guess... I guess we'll be having a baby."

It was silent for a moment before you spoke again.

"I'm going to be a father."

And when I looked up at you, I was surprised to find a smile lighting up your face and possibilities of the future flickering through your eyes.

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