Trigger warning: I talk about someone seeing my self harm
I was in musical theatre and someone pointed out my self harm scars and I had a breakdown over it. I'm recovering now but it stressed me out really bad. It was like really loud and someone told me a story of how their friend died from it and I thought I was safe to show it and I didn't think anyone would ask or anything. I'm trying not to start crying again paha It's not like I'm even friends with the person who asked either.
I was sat with my friend Woody talking about Heathers the musical or something, when the boy behind us, Sethan, said to me: "have you committed self harm?" I was wearing a short sleaved shirt. I said, trying to stay confident, "yes. But it's none of your business." He seemed to be smirking a little, I don't know him that well. He then said that he wouldn't talk about it anymore. The catch is that we were surrounded by people. I started shaking a little and Woody turned to me and said, "no self harm." He smiled gently and I nodded, "I'm getting better." He then decided it would be okay to tell me that his friend nearly died from it, so I nodded and repeated that it's getting better. I walked down the stairs to the lower seats of the auditorium and sat next to jamie. She said hi to me and I greeted her back. Next thing I know I'm fighting back tears, "can I talk to you outside for a moment?" I ask her, and she nods urgently and we walk outside. Our friend Elizabeth is on the phone to someone but doesn't say anything for a while. Jamie asks me what's wrong and I'm crying and gasping for words, I tell her what happened and she gives me a huge hug. I'm still crying, I can't seem to stop. I tell her I'm scared he'll tell people and she says she's sure nobody will judge me for it. I just nod and Elizabeth comes over, I tell her the rough outline of what happened and she tells me I should get direct help. I tell her I'm getting better, I'm okay now. And she nods. Then Katy (the leader of MT) comes over and asks me repeatedly what's wrong, I just say "nothing. Nothing, I'm okay." She asks Jamie and Elizabeth if I'm telling the truth and they both nod. Katy asks me if I want to sit out for a while and I nod, I sit in my place and scramble in my bag for the bandage. This is when I first text you. I feel sick from crying. During Chim Chimney I run back up onstage and join in, all the while trying not to brake down crying again. A few people ask me what's wrong, Riley rushes over once we're done and tells me that Jamie told her what happened. I give them a huge hug, they seem angry about what happened, I tell them that it's okay and that I'm fine now, just a bit shaken. Now I'm at home and kind of anxious, both about the performance tonight, but also that Elizabeth or Sethan will tell someone.
