Hers 2 (Ruby Rose)

23| Wildfire

SHITTY DAYS TURNED into shitty weeks, and I was certain that soon it would be shitty months.

Finding out that Joshua and his family would be moving to Germany permanently just felt like icing on the cake.

While they thoughtfully gave me a few weeks notice, I still struggled to take it well.

I was angry, an emotion that had become default to me.

The job had been my favourite by far, so it tore me to pieces to realize it was over.

But I knew there was no use crying over it. I needed to start looking for another job. Luckily, I had enough savings to last me until so.

I skipped the sad songs on the radio during the drive home. I also skipped the love songs, leaving me with nothing else to listen to. So instead, I drove in silence, just processing everything wrong with my life.

I HAD BOOKED this appointment weeks in advance because I was scared to go through with what I was about to. This could change things forever. It would confirm everything I already knew, yet struggled to come to terms with.

As the tattoo artist prepared his equipment, I stared at my reflection through the mirror that was hanging across the other side of the room, surrounded by printed artwork that other clients could take inspiration on.

I could see the blue outline of a feather laid across my collarbone, over the black ink that was already there.

The tattooist swung around on his stool to face me, needle in his black gloved hand. "Alright, ready?"

I nodded, pressing my lips firmly together.

The sound seemed to get louder as he moved closer towards me, his hand hovering over my skin.

But before the needle could touch me, my hand shot up.

"Wait," I said, causing him to sit up straight.

I didn't have any other words to say, so after a long silence between us, he spoke again.

"I know this is hard," he said gently, "so many clients come in to get coverups, so you don't have to feel ashamed about it." It wasn't that I was ashamed, it was the fact that it would mean that I was letting go.

I wasn't proud of the tattoo that I once decided to cherish. I didn't want to be reminded of her every time I saw myself in the reflection. I didn't want people to continue to ask me who she was.

"I'm ready," I said, nodding before resting my head back.

He gave me a sympathetic smile and leaned over again, one hand on my shoulder. "Just relax your shoulders, and think of this as a new beginning."

WHEN I ARRIVED at work the next day, I didn't expect Joshua's mother to stick around for so long, watching me with Joshua.

When we made eye contact, he gestured for me to follow her. I excused myself from Josh before following her into the second living room, feeling slightly tense about what she would tell me. Were they leaving earlier than expected? I still hadn't found another job, regardless of the number of places I had applied to.

"Ellis, I'd like you to explain this." She tapped on her phone before passing it over to me.

I took it, squinting slightly as I looked at the image. When I realized what it was, my heart suddenly felt like it was hooked around my throat.

My mugshot. Someone posted my mugshot. Not just someone, but a Ruby fan account.

Not only did the extreme intoxication show on my face, but I had makeup smeared under my eyes and my hair looked disheveled, like someone had wrestled me.

I couldn't tear my eyes away from the phone. I could partially see some of the comments at the bottom of the screen.

Tragic.

Dangerous.

I'm glad they broke up. Ruby really needed to get rid of that negativity in her life.

"I'm sorry Ellis, but I don't think it's appropriate if you continue to see Joshua." She said, frowning at me.

"Can I at least explain?" I asked, looking up at her with tears in my eyes.

"I honestly don't want to hear it. You're lucky that we're moving anyway. I just wish I found out sooner than later." She sighed. "You're dismissed."

"Please, I can't- I can't go home." I pleaded. "Not right now. I-I need to keep working."

"Ellis, leave."

I held back a sob as I walked away, passing Joshua who was still where I had last seen him. He looked at me with sad eyes, and I paused in the doorway, giving him a small wave, walking away quickly before I burst in front of him.

The picture continued to spread like wildfire. Online articles were made on it, putting pictures of Ruby and I together followed by my mugshot.

I read so many different versions that I thought my brain would explode. I was deep into the comments now, not one nice comment about me left. Not even any sympathetic ones.

I could not avoid the text message that appeared on the top of the screen. It said it was an unknown number, but I knew who it was.

From: Unknown Number
Are you okay?

That's when I truly, truly broke.

I grasped the pillow to my chest and curled up into a ball onto my side.

I didn't reply to the message.