Fuzzy thoughts

Let go

     "So I was thinkin' some thin' different than the norm that we do, instead of BAM! New song, like.....I don't know.....I mean it has been a long time since people heard us. Bet they thought we broke up after plastic beach, things did look down....." he stopped talking. He got up, opened his door, then came out with his bass.

     "Well how about we start on the first song, huh?" He played random notes. His heart didn't feel like the usual when he played. It felt dispirited. He strained his ears to hear the littlest faint noises from the closed room.Come on! I'm trying ta say sorry! Please just come out! Please.

Minutes passed of Murdoc just strumming crummy sounding notes. No answer from the other side.

Why would he come out anyways, I mean all of the things I've put him through! HA! I sure did treat him like he was in hell! He stopped playing his bass, thinking of the times he's beaten 2d. The worst one was probably right after El mañana music video, when those 2 thought Noodle was dead. Russel left right there, too sad to even move. But 2d, he ran up to me, blaming me, it was my idea after all to put her in the situation. He punched me with all his might. It was like he was having a mental break down from everything that happened. I remember, he fell to his knees still hitting me, still cryin'. I tried to explain but he wouldn't let me talk. He kept interrupting me! Even now when I think about it, augh! I get so angry.... to easily. But, I ended up kneeing him in the throat, kicking him in the stomach, I kept hittin' him when he went unconscious.

Murdoc was just about to leave the door,until, when the door behind him disappeared. Murdoc fell onto his back, his head in between the singers long stick legs, he looked at the face: his button nose dried with blood, the top was red, his eyes bloodshot and puffy, his face glistened from the light, cleaned with tears.

Murdoc sat up straight, disbelief in his eyes that he would come out.

2d sat next to the bass player with a thump, the door space separating them.

Murdoc placed the bass down, and started to down his food, alone time, this is what I wanted. Why does it have this uncomfortable feeling. Murdoc struggled to find the feeling, it was distressing.

2d got up, and walked into his blacked out room, almost as dark as Murdoc's if it weren't for the blue tint of the moon coming through the shades. Murdoc peered inside, he saw the bluenettes shadowy figure pick something up. He walked out to the bright hallway with his keyboard, he started to play melodies, but not singing.

Murdoc was disappointed, he loved to hear the angelic voice. It was so different from when he talked, instead of falling and stumbling through words, they flew right out of his broken mouth.It was astounding.

Murdoc heard the sound, he felt the meaning behind the music. Either it is just me putting my..... feel....ings to his melodies, but it sounds hollow, something is missing.

Murdoc picked up his bass, I will fill the hollowness, I'll be there for him. Even.... even though he hates me for hurting him, for ruining him. I don't like it. I don't!! I can't help it! Murdoc fought the war in his head. He loved 2d with all his heart, but you can't always trust 100%. There was that little bit of worry. What if it's just a crush? A long one?

     Murdoc didn't notice, but 2d grabbed his notebook, and sat down directly next to him, no large space separating the two. His eyes still puffy, and cleaned with tears, he had cried a lot.

     I hope he doesn hit me again. I just wanna be a litt— no I stopped thinkin'..... I stopped, I did! Murdoc's hand went to 2d's jaw. It grabbed him so he couldn't move, it hurt.

     "Come on." Murdoc got up leading him into the singers room. He didn't follow. Murdoc noticed, he turned back and grabbed the singer by the arm, causing a small bruise on the arm later. They went into his bathroom. Hmm, it's surprisingly more messy than mine! Murdoc thought.

     He dismissed the thought and grabbed a maybe or maybe not used face towel. He went to the dirt covered sink. Toothbrushes and toothpaste all over the place. His medicine cabinet was still open, on the sink was a spilled over pill bottle. Most of the pills were gone. He wetted the face cloth. Turned back to 2d who waited outside his bathroom.

     When Murdoc approached with his fist up, face towel in hand, he flinched back so his back hit the wall. Murdoc kept moving towards him. 2d seemed to accept what he was about to get, closing one eye. Unexpectedly, Murdoc roughly cleaned off the singers face, cleaning off the tear stains and dried blood. There was still a tint of red on his nose and eyes but that was it.

     Murdoc threw the facecloth onto the floor, adding one more thing won't hurt. He then tugged on 2d's arm and dragged him out to sit where he was before, them sitting right next to each other.

     They played melodies and counter-melodies together. Some words escaping the singers mouth, not smooth like usual and none that would stay together in a song, they were all scrambled, no pieces connecting.

Murdoc kept side glancing at the singer, slouching on the wall next to his shoulder, he could barely feel his exotic hair brush against his shoulder.

Murdoc noticed his face, eyes closed, head tilted upwards, just a slight. Murdoc scooted closer to him. 2d noticed this, but his keyboard was a little too big to move, it did sit on his lap and it would be hard to move like that. He just settled into it, not making it noticeably enjoyable.

Groowwwwllll.

Embarrassment took over 2d, Murdoc had a smirk. He then took the keyboard off 2d and replaced it with the bowl of rice and chicken. Murdoc did the same with his bass. They both started to eat.

Silence grew within the dimming hallway. Light slowly disappeared,the space between the two disappeared. 2d was now sitting on Murdoc's lap, they were hugging.

     "Murdoc?" 2d's voice came out as a whisper. Murdoc hummed in response.

Hesitation then intrigued murdoc, where was he going with this. A smirk grew on Murdoc's face. He grabbed 2d's face-cheek. 2d tensed, but relaxed into the touch. Murdoc's smirk grew into a larger smile. Time slowed. 2d felt small amounts of hot breath. He knew what was going to happen. He accepted it.

They're lips connected, at first it was a small peck. Then a deep make-out session. Murdoc's arms wrapped around 2d's waist tighter. 2d brought them closer by wrapping his arms around Murdoc's neck. Murdoc licked the bottom lip of 2d's, he did not react, he knew what murdoc wanted. He was afraid though, what if this was all a mistake? Murdoc's hands started to caress his sides, seeing if he would bend to his will, he didn't.

     He then held tight to the singers sides, making sure he wouldn't move. He then went down and started to lick 2d's neck. 2d started to get confused. Then murdoc slightly bit down, earning a soft small gasp from 2d, murdoc smirked.

     Murdoc looked up too see 2d's lovely face, but when he went to, 2d sat up, picked up his keyboard and notebook. He put them in his room. Murdoc irritated that he had to stop harshly grabbed 2d's shoulder making him fall to the ground, he stood back. Murdoc kept his grip, not going to let go until he got what he wanted.

     "Murdoc....." 2d's soft voice whispered,"please let go" a sniffle was heard. Murdoc didn't let go, he kept pressuring.

     "Let go!" His voice more stern now. You won't be able to control him for long either. Russels words echoed through his head. Still he didn't let go.

"Everything is always a mistake with ya!! No matta what, I always end up gettin hurt, both ways" His voice had faded away at the end. He didn't want to be touched, he wanted to leave. He changed his direction and tried to go down stairs.

Murdoc let him go finally, still stunned. 2d ran down the stairs. Murdoc went to his room.

    
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So this is the first time I wrote something with...adult content? Yeah sure, let's call it that. But if I can make it better please tell me!!