blind date » david dobrik

nineteen » iced out

It took me a few days to regroup. The letter from my grandpa had me thinking, but not the right things. Was he always right? Yes. But David had seriously hurt me. Just because I loved him didn't mean he deserved my forgiveness. I couldn't let the first person I loved change my life forever.

I finally decided, after some careful thought, that I would do nothing. David showed up at my house the day after the breakup, but I kept the door locked and pretended I wasn't home. Natalie came by the next day, with a box of my things and a note on top. I gave the note back to her, shot her a quick wave, and shut the door in her face. It did hurt to be mean to Natalie, but the only way I could get over David was a deep cleansing. That meant forgetting he ever existed.

It was very lonely. I cried every single day, sometimes not even about David. I didn't even want to leave the house besides going to work and the grocery store, so I didn't. I stayed home at all times, eating and sleeping away my feelings, only to get wake up sadder than I was before. It was miserable.

I wished I had never met him in the first place. I believed wholeheartedly that I could've been happy in my shitty life if I had never experienced having real friends and someone to love me. I could've spent my whole life not knowing the joys of companionship. But, since David introduced me to it, I would never be satisfied with my old life. I wanted more.

That attitude made me want to move on ten times more. If I wanted to make friends again, I didn't need to be hung up on a guy that didn't give a shit about me. I decided that my first step would be returning to the boys' house to pick up the three pairs of shoes and handful of DVDs that I had left over there. After texting Jason to make sure it was okay that I stopped by, I got ready. I didn't want to look like I was trying; I just wanted to look normal. Unaffected. If I could act like it wasn't hurting, maybe it wouldn't anymore. Fake it until you make it.

I brushed my hair and put on my usual makeup, settling on a pretty ironic white t-shirt that said, "the fuck you fallin' in love for?" on it. I paired it with some denim shorts and a trendy black belt. Once I decided that I was ready, and after listening to a thirty minute podcast about getting over a breakup, I drove over to the boys' house. I sat outside for a few minutes, controlling my breathing and giving myself a pep talk. If Ariana Grande could be that bitch, so could I.

I knocked on the door and waited a few moments until Scotty pulled it open.

"Charlotte? What are you— what are you doing here?" Scott stepped outside with me, shutting the door behind him.

"I texted Jason and asked if I could come by to get my shoes and my movies," I responded awkwardly before I realized I needed to be confident around these people. "He said it was fine and I could come whenever."

"David's here..." Scott trailed off, a concerned look on his face. I couldn't tell if he was looking out for me or David, but I was going inside either way.

"Okay? My shoes and movies are in there too," I sassed and he sighed, opening the door for me. The front room was empty, save for Jason who was on his computer editing. He stood when I came in and tried to wrap me in a hug. I didn't hug back.

"I'll tell you where your stuff is," he told me, and when I turned to make my way there, he grabbed my wrist. "But we're talking first."

"About what?" I scoffed, crossing my arms over my chest. "I have nothing to say."

"David has not slept or eaten in four days," Jason sighed, keeping a tight grip on my shoulders so I couldn't walk away. "He is my best friend, and he is devastated because of you. He is so heartbroken it's unreal."

"How is this my problem? Tell him to shove his dick in Liza and move on," I rolled my eyes, trying to pull away once again, but Jason was much stronger.

"I want you to talk to him, please. Just talk to him. At least give him some kind of explanation."

"He doesn't need an explanation," I snapped, finally freeing myself of his grip. "Tell him to move on. I have."

"Could you stop pretending that you're a heartless bitch for two seconds and listen to yourself? I have never heard you be mean to anyone and now you're acting like you couldn't care less about how the love of your life feels," he was whisper yelling, but it still hurt. I thought back to the pep talk I gave myself and rolled my eyes, stepping away from the situation before Jason said something that actually broke my character.

"Where's my stuff, Jason?"

He sighed, pausing for a second before a soft grin grew on his face. He said, "It's in Todd's room."

I made my way back to Todd's bedroom, knocking twice to ensure I didn't walk in on him and Corinna boning. David must've been in the kitchen, because I didn't see him on my way back. I heard Corinna say, "Come in!", so I followed her instructions and entered the room.

It was like a bucket of ice water poured over my head. I knew Corinna and Todd were sitting on the floor together, but the only thing I saw was David. Everything Jason said had to have been true. He looked awful, with dark circles surrounding his eyes and messy hair, worse than usual. It looked like he hadn't slept in a year, not just four days. The worst part was the heartbroken look when I completely glossed over him, turning to look at Todd.

"Jason said some of my stuff was in here," I said harshly, but softened when I saw the confused look on Todd's face.

"No, you had some shoes in here, but Jason took them and put them in a box," Todd informed me, and I internally rolled my eyes. Fucking Jason Nash. He wanted me to see David, hoping it would fuck me up enough to want to talk. It wouldn't.

"Oh. Sorry then," I turned on my heel and exited the room, shutting the door behind me. I willed myself not to cry, especially in front of Jason. He didn't deserve it. When I came back to the front room, Jason had disappeared, and a small cardboard box with my stuff in it sat in front of the two front doors. Written on it, the words "think about it."

I hated how Jason was right. I couldn't forgive David, not now, but it still felt raw. Jason and Papa were so in sync; they knew me too well, and it hurt. It sucked. But I kept pressing on, knowing one day, I'd realize all of this would've happened for a reason. I prayed that day would come quickly.

please vote comment and follow ive literally accidentally deleted THREE good ANs trying to make them bold and italics....... fml

also i was gonna update this way later tonight but lots of ppl wanted an update and ur bitch delivered lol

QUESTION: what country/state are you guys from?? im just interested lol