Passover love

Chapter 39

           

Chapter 39

"What are you doing here?" I said, shocked. How did he know that I'm here? Or I'm just basically dreaming? I suppose this would be real. Pinching my cheeks mattered.

He laugh mockingly. "You disappeared. Without any notice! How would you expect that huh? And now! You're asking me why I'm here?" he clamor.

"I-I'm so sorry...I was just contemplating things..."

"You should just have at least, told me so! I was so worried. Damn worried!" He takes a step towards my bed and now I just found myself hugging him.

"Don't do that again..."

I found myself sniffing to catch air that supposedly, I have to be angry at him for ruining my window but now, I was the one crying. Things mattered to me so much. He hush me while brushing my hair.

"Are you okay? Is anything bad happened to you? Why did you left? You left us so worried that makes us come directly here when we saw no trace of you..."

"I'm sorry." I said in between my sobs.

"Shh...its okay...It's okay. Tell me, are you okay?" He asked me once again.

I shifted at the bed, making myself away from his hug. I closed my eyes, contemplating things.

"Why did you lie?" My voice was too broken. I felt a huge lump in my throat but tried to avoid myself from crying once again.

"What do you mean---"

"I said why did you lie?" I tried to hide my anger.

"What are you talking about? Is this about your medicine for your sickness? Look, let's just ask---"

I shook my head a lot of times. "No. no. No!" He stopped a bit when he saw my facial expression.

"Y-you lied t-to me..." My lips are shaking.

"Look---"

I snapped my fingers in front of him.

"You...All of you...l-lied t-to me..." My voice was too hoarse. I pointed him in the chess.

"The real happenings a year ago? You didn't tell me...I know you just did that to protect me. You, Mother and all people. You think I wouldn't know? I just knew this two years ago! I was suffering wild dreams about it every night! I always vomit when I remembered it! It was the worst...I hate the feeling...it stayed...the feeling Sphinx..."

"Sphinx..." He said, looking at me intently.

I smiled bitterly. "Even your name, you lied to me. Right, Sphinx Reian Lifaxscera?"

"Vas..."

"I know, you're just protecting me from my Father. But, he's dead. Right?"

"Yes..."

"And my Mom is also dead." He nodded.

"My...mother right now, is m-my Mom's s-sister?" I asked.

He nodded.

"Valentina Trendafila Radostina Silexcza, is my Mother?"

"Yes. You looked like her. So much."

My lips are shaking while my tears couldn't stop flowing.

"I-I'm glad...But...I don't remember her face. Because her picture is in a blur...But...how did you know that she looked so much like me?"

He claps his hands together while he put it gently in his knees.

"My mother and your Mom, Valentina, are friends."

I smiled. "R-really? C-can I see her picture?" He handed me his phone and saw a picture of two beautiful girls, smiling genuinely with matching shirts.

"Beautiful..." I commented.

"Really...so, so, so beautiful" He said, looking at me.

"I'm...I'm already 23 right?" I avoided our eye contact.

"Yes...We're sorry f-for keeping this."

I laughed with fakery, "I really thought I was nineteen. But it was fun. I get to live by being a nineteen years old girl, wishing her memories will comeback. Which it did. And finally, she got a complete and and honest answer."

"Vas..."

"You know what? I get it. I don't deserve no one. That also explains your broken marriage. The girl you almost married thought you love your sister but the truth is...you and I we're in a relationship that time. But you broke up with me, before the marriage happened."

"I got so devastated so I thought that maybe I'll stay in my father's place...Since we have gone out to other country for college."

"Then that's the time I knew, my father killed Mama."

"I got all Mommy's savings, especially her million cost jewelry. Mom said that I need to pass it to generations. Since it was too old. Isn't this story similar to you, Sphinx?" I asked.

He held my hands and nodded.

"I took you away from you father before we got to college because I knew, in the first place, he was abusing you and your mother." He said.

"When I heard you got to marry someone, I called out to Papa, and asked for his helped. Since that time I have a lot of things in mind, you, mama, and papa, I agreed to have him helped me. But he was just actually playing with me. He needed mother's jewelry but I didn't gave him the pleasure."

"I-I didn't know about that..." He said, choking back his tears.

"My childhood was from another world I thought. Something that no one should live through. I was physically abused, verbally abused, abandoned, and starved. I was given up on and dumped from wherever... even to the worst of people who would rip your soul out it felt. My life was the beating of anything that my own Father could grab or throw at me."

"He will pull my hair out and throw me by the hair. Lock me in rooms for days without food. I thought of dying...I was dying in my head I wanted to kill myself. " My tears didn't stop pooling.

"Thought I could escape this pain and neglect. I kept on thinking but something had stopped me, He spoke to me... He told me "I am here, Fight stronger, live, you are amazing" that took away everything the Father told me, I'm ugly, God's mistake, trash who nobody will pick up, nobody cares about this nobody... " I believed that God is what makes me strong. My energy giver.

"His words overpowered everything. I just tried my best until I was able to tell somebody about what was happening. I was taken away from the state and put with my dad that I barely know. I have no Idea that my Mom died 2 months ago before I knew. But now I realize that I have two people with me. Jesus and you."

"My memories are back. But my memory with my mother didn't. I just remembered that she died, only that."

He hushed my while he enveloped me in a warm hug.

"At twenty one, I fell from the 3rd Floor of a building and broke my hip. Because my Father asked for the jewelry but I didn't gave him. As I was falling, I was praying to God to take care of my other relatives and you because I thought I was going to die. To this day, I have 2 big scars on my right hip. They remind me of how wonderful God was to me for letting me survive." I said.

"After tragedy as struck and I have found nowhere to turn and I finally decided to turn to God and find my faith again. I felt like he let me down by letting all of these bad things happen. I believe those things happened to get me on the right track for my new journey and to find my faith again. I have started going back to church and it's a feeling I can't completely explain... I feel at peace and at home...and it's not been easy. "

"So, telling this to you really hit home. Thank you." I said before I felt all the tiredness, all the waters I shed, pays back that makes me sleep in his lap.