High Off Love

Chapter 13

September 2nd

"So, do you want to get together or something?" I ask Toby over the phone.

"Uh.. I don't think we should do that." He answers quietly.

All my hope as disappeared once again.

I try to hold my words in but they slip, "Don't you get it? I am lost without you Toby, I need you. Toby, you are my other half, you make me good, you help me, you wake me up, you... you... you are everything I want and I don't think I can hold on any longer." Why did I just say that?

"Look, I'm upset too but you just have to know it will get better."

I hang up on him. Why did I just hang up on him? I stomp all the way up to my room. So angry. I'm a failure. I go to my roof, and Rachel is there taking a few puff of weed.

"I thought you didn't smoke?" I question.

"Only sometimes."

I take the whiskey and drink it from the bottle. It burns, but feels so amazing.

I drink until I can't see straight. I drank the whole bottle, I smoked most of the weed. No thoughts are thought. No Toby is seen.

Rachel moves me inside before I fall off the roof.

"We need some music." Rachel gets up to look at my music. "This is all really good."

She turns on "Skinny Love" By Birdy.

"Come on skinny love, what happened here..." I sing along.

Rachel laughs at my attempt. I lay down and fall asleep.

....

I wake up to the song "I See Fire" by Ed Sheeran. I find my phone and check it. I slept a lot, it's the next day and three o'clock. I hear my sisters voice.

I get up and go down stairs. My sister is here and on the phone.

"Where's mom?" I ask interrupting her phone call.

She tells the person she is talking to bye and answers me, "She went to work so I'm here, and the girls are at school."

"Don't you have work?"

"Yes, but I don't have any patients for two weeks."

Two weeks with my sister.

"Well on Mondays I usually go places that I need to go. I'm leaving in about thirty minutes if you want to come." My mature sister informs me.

"I'll go get dressed and ready."

I go up to my big room, open the doors to my big walk in closet, and pick out short shorts, a tank top, fishnets, and combat boots. Go to my bags and pull out my makeup bag. A note from Toby is in it.

"I hope we will find a way back together someday, but it's not the time right now. I'll call you."

How is he the one to decide the time. At least he called me. Why would he call me? Maybe he misses me.

"Maybe he just wanted to see if you were about to get drunk and high off your ass." The darkness adds to my thoughts.

I put some mascara on, brush my hair and teeth. I go downstairs to see if my sister is ready to leave yet.

"Ready?" She chirps while grabbing her keys.