F*ck Fate! (Book 3)

Chapter Sixteen: Unexpected Conversations

Andy

I was just leaving my last class for the day when my phone rang. I moved over to the side of the hallway to answer. I couldn't ignore a call from my mother, even if I were to call her back in a few minutes.

She started speaking before I could even say "hello".

"Andy! I'm so glad you answered! I'm at your apartment. When are you coming back here? I'd love to spend some time with you."

"Hi Mom," I said. "I just got out of class. I'll be back there soon."

I knew there was no point in asking why she was here. I also knew that it wasn't just to spend some time with me.

To my surprise, she told me anyway. "I heard from Rita you have a new boyfriend. Why didn't you tell me about him, Andy? You know I want to know these things!"

I sighed. "I didn't tell you about Lance because nothing's going to happen between us. He's not even really my boyfriend. All we did was go out a couple times and he spent one night. That's it."

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

I nearly dropped the phone when I looked to my left to see Lance standing there. He obviously heard everything I had just said about him. I hadn't had the chance to actually talk about ending things between us yet. Guess the cat was out of the bag now.

Mom was saying something, but I was no longer listening. "Mom, I gotta go," I said, cutting her off. "I'll be home soon." Then I hung up the phone and hurried after Lance.

"Lance!" I called. He didn't stop, pushing through the building's doors to head outside. "Lance, please!"

He stopped next to the street, slowly turning around to face me. "Is it true?" he asked when I caught up.

"I am so sorry," I started. "I was going to call you to see if we could get together and talk about it. Do you have time now?"

He sighed before looking at his watch. "Yeah, a few minutes." He then motioned for a bench that was next to the building and I followed him over there.

Once he was sitting, I said, "Can I just start by saying that I do like you? I think you're an amazing guy."

"So why end this, Andy? I honestly thought what we had was going really well."

"It was... but..." I was at a loss for words, which rarely happens to me. I couldn't just tell him I wanted to break this off because the sex was bad and he didn't have the same intellect as I did. So I made something up, which, admittedly, had some truth to it too.

"We just want different things in life. Sure, we could compromise on a bunch of stuff, but neither of us will truly be okay. Not you. I spend a lot of time thinking about where my life will lead me because I have to. I don't have many options. But you do. I'm just going to hold you back if we pursue this. You need someone who can keep up with you and play baseball and other sports. I'm never going to be able to do that with you, which is why we'd never be able to make a real relationship work. I hope you can understand that."

Lance grabbed both of my hands with his. "Andy... we can make this work. I don't care if you can't play sports or do all that stuff. Being with you would be worth it."

I shook my head, taking my hands back. "You'd figure it out eventually. You are too nice to lead on. I wanted to talk to you - to end this - before we both got in too deep and it hurt so much more to let go. Trust me Lance, you would be the perfect boyfriend if I didn't have all these issues with myself."

I could tell he was thinking hard about what I said. After a moment, he finally nodded his head solemnly. "I get it," he said, "but I wish it wasn't true."

I gave him a small smile. "Me too."

"Can we at least stay friends?"

I nodded. "Yeah. Of course."

Lance leaned forward and gave me a kiss on the cheek before standing up. He then headed down the street, not looking back.

I watched him for a minute, hating that I just had to do that to him. It would have been easier if I had more time to come up with what to say instead of him overhearing what he did, but at least he understood.

As I headed home - rather slowly because I didn't feel the need to rush to see my mother - I thought about what I had said. It was true: I was just going to hold anyone back, no matter who they are. What makes me think Shawn would be any different? Sure, from what I could tell, he was either working or playing video games, not doing sports like Lance does, but that doesn't mean he can't if he wanted to. He was able-bodied. I wasn't. I should have learned by now that that has an affect on a relationship.

When I got onto my street, I immediately spotted my mother's silver Lexus parked outside my apartment. That meant she drove, so Dad didn't come with her. Not that I was expecting him to come too, it just would have been nice to see them both at the same time. That hasn't happened since my birthday a few months ago.

Unlocking the front door, I called out for my mother. It wasn't a very large place, so she had to be inside somewhere.

She poked her head out of my bedroom. "Andy! Finally! I almost thought you weren't going to come. I can't stay too much longer, just passing through the area. I wanted to stop by and see you, even if it's just for a few minutes."

She hurried over to me, leaning over and giving me a tight hug. I breathed in her familiar perfume, which was a comforting smell of my childhood.

When she released the hug, she stood up, but grabbed my hands in hers. The whiteness of her skin was a striking contrast against mine, but one I was used to. I got my skin color from my father.

"Now, honey," she said. "I need you to be honest with me. There are two receipts in your bedroom for fast food. Are you eating healthy enough? Rita is bringing you the right kinds of food, right? You have enough food?"

"Mom," I stressed. "You don't have to worry about me. I forgot my wallet here and Kat gave me a giftcard there for lunch. The next day I bought her lunch to make up for it. Other than that, of course I'm eating healthy."

So maybe I lied a little bit. But I couldn't exactly tell her why I went back the next day. She'd need every possible detail about Shawn I could muster.

I also didn't know why I still had those receipts or where she found them. They must have been buried somewhere.

Lying to a lawyer probably wasn't the best idea, but I've gotten away with it so many times. Today was not an exception. Maybe I really was a good liar, or maybe she always decided she'd rather not push the truth out of me.

"So tell me about this Lance fellow."

I sighed. I felt like this visit was going to be a lot longer than just a few minutes.