fake rose // chaelisa

special chapter: whose fault is it?

a/n:
every special chapter will be posted in 3rd person. enjoy this little something i made for you guys <3 listen to the song, okie? it's really good :]

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the wind brushes against lisa's skin comfortably, it wasn't even that cold, but lisa finds herself snuggling into her oversized sweater for warmth and comfort. visiting her apartment's rooftop had become a habit whenever she feels lonely, whenever she feels like the moon is the perfect company.

she drowns in her own silence, her mind flashes back four days ago, to the exact words she uttered to chaeyoung that caused the slightly older girl to almost burst into tears.

it was her fault.

it's always her fault. she'd like to think.

her own words echoed inside her head and she felt awful. as if her insides are twisting in a sick manner, she wanted to shout.

and instead of dealing with the problem in a mature manner, lisa thought that it would be better if she just give chae time to maybe think about it.

lisa knows she should call chaeyoung right now, but she doesn't want to. she's too afraid that chaeyoung would answer and tell her that it would be better if they just break up. that it would be better if they just forget about each other.

most of the time, lisa is selfless - especially when it comes to her girlfriend of 5 years, so, if chaeyoung even just ask lisa to end their relationship if that means that she would be happy - lisa would do it a second- no hesitation - lisa would anything for her.

but of course, lisa would never want that. she had never experienced hell, but if she has to guess what it feels like; she would describe hell to be a life without chaeyoung. and as the night grows deeper, her mind becomes more of a time bomb. every tick of the clock on her wrist, the urge to explode becomes more inevitable.

lisa is always vulnerable whenever it comes to her.

and again, she knows that she should call chaeyoung.

but she didn't.

chaeyoung sighed for the nth time today. the homemade dinner she cooked thrown into the trashcan because it was too cold to consume enjoyably, she had also lost all her appetite to eat, but the main reason is because the person she cooked it for - didn't even bother to come.

it's been a while the last time she felt this disappointed. well, it's not even just disappointment anymore; it's a mix of anger, sadness, betrayal and of course, disappointment.

she felt somewhat thankful that blackpink no longer share one dorm because the other members wouldn't have to see her on the verge of crying. with another deep sigh, she walked herself to her bedroom and plopped her body on the soft mattress. when her exhausted body contacted the bed, the urge to cry increased.

it's not the fact that the dinner she worked hard for turned into waste that truly bummed her out, it's the fact that lisa didn't come when she promised that she would. the food she made didn't matter to her, what truly mattered to chaeyoung was lisa - being with lisa, spending time with her, she wanted to make it up for all the time she couldn't give to her because blackpink had to promote longer than expected.

she waited for a reply, a call, an explanation, a text that says that they can reschedule their dinner date - anything.

chaeyoung, most of the time, forgive lisa in a heartbeat. but there's only so much a person can take before they burst.

lisa got back inside her apartment at exactly two in the morning. she can still feel the guilt gnawing at her trembling heart, she wanted to cry, but would tears make chaeyoung less disappointed at her?