Struggles

Please make me happy!

I can doubt my depression but I can't doubt how much I love her.

She was tough and rough, she scarcely showed love.

But something deep inside tells me she loves me. Maybe I am illusioned.

She said she was bored.. yeah maybe I am boring.

She said I was lame.. well, both of them before her said I was.

But she apologized.. well she loves me after all.
How can someone love another yet hurt him? I never hurt her.

She says I don't encourage her. I listen to every single word she says with carefulness.

She is such a bitch, but I love her, she is deeply kind and warm.

Yes, she is so warm that her hands were warmer than the sun when I used to hold them.

I can't now. She is too religious. She is too complicated. But I love her.

She used to look me in the eyes and say I love you. Now she barely says so.

But she said it during the call last night.. it was cold and harsh.

Maybe I am boring afterall.. wait she is calling!
Ugh nevermind. She loves me again.

I don't know what to do with her. I am not sure about anything anymore.
But I still trust her.. I have no choice.

' I missed you today ', she said. And my heart skipped a beat.
I told her I miss her every single night when she is not beside me, I told her that I wish we would marry.

She said she needed a break.
I was alone again.

I try somehow to talk to others, but I don't find myself except deep in her voice.

' I can't have this break, I miss you ', she said, leaving me confused.
Man, I wish I could know what's on her mind.

I used to know though, before everything went so complicated.

I wish I could fix this, but she only can.

I am not happy darling, please, I beg you don't do this!
She breaks out and cries.
Maybe she loves me after all.

He flirts with her and I go mad. She laughs it off.
Or maybe she is laughing at me.
I should get mad.
And now she cries.

Man, I wish I could just disappear and watch her from above.
She says she will miss me, I sometimes doubt that.
She misses me when I am gone anyhow!

She says when she sees me everything goes right..
Everything is right since you entered my life, darling.

Oh, I wish I could just hold you tight and tell how sad I am..
But maybe you don't care.

***********************
Relationships can sometimes get complicated, after about 6 months one of the two love birds starts to get bored.
The thing is, by working it out hard, understanding and a lot of taking in can solve it.