The Sacrifice: Forgotten | Loki | Book 1

Chapter 25: Shade of Green

(Caroline's P.O.V.)

"But I really don't want to..."   I groaned and threw the pile of shirts back on the bed. I officially refused packing my bag, like a child. 

"Come on, a week in the UK will do you good. You need some variation and since all the universities closed yesterday you have no excuse to stay here alone."  She insisted.

"What about my job? I can't leave Mr. Stevens in the lurch. He needs somebody for the newspapers - "  I said, but she cut me off. As always.

"Don't worry, I quit your job for you yesterday. I told him you feel very bad and that you're very sorry and he took it with a shrug. Now pack or I'll make your ass pack."  She threatened.

"Stupid hoe."  I murmured and continued packing until I had all the things I needed for a week in the UK. The weather there wasn't too different from the weather here, so I didn't have to get out my summer things.

It didn't really matter, my state didn't allow me to leave the house. I was depressed and was forced to eat and drink by Xenia. She did everything she could to lift my mood and to erase Tom from my mind. But something was off about me, and it was different. As I said, now I know that I'd been compromised by Loki's mind tricks. But then, I believed it was the few days together that made me love him to death.

Xenia had dumped everything that could remind me of Tom: His clothes, his books, his everything...

She didn't knew I still had that video of him tickling her and throwing a fit, and that I watched it every night before crying myself to sleep. The pain he left me in made me numb to any other emotion. My source of tears eventually dried out. Another thing she couldn't destroy was his scent in my room and especially in my bed, causing me to believe he was still alive at night.

Sitting on my bed and staring at my suitcase that seemed to grow with every passing second, I noticed I forgot my passport inside the nightstand.  I rose reluctantly and knelt down, opening the wooden drawer. A respectable bunch of sheets greeted me in there, and I assumed they were some of my essays, but - 

The font looked nothing like mine. And nothing like Xenia's either.

I read the first lines and it instantly hit me who had written this journal. During his lifetime, he had written down everything he had to endure inside. His nightmares, some short memories...  And his abilities. I read all the fourteen sheets in less than half an hour and when I finished I shed one single tear in relief that he had left me a piece of him.

Suddenly, a dull thud made me jump.

"Xenia? Is that you?" I called out, be there was no response. 

I slowly walked through the corridor, just to notice our block of flats had a total blackout. Shit, I was beginning to freak out - that was anything but good.

Panic started arising in me. I continued, letting my hands guide me, and entered the living room. Xenia's small figure was lying on the ground.

"XENIA!"  I screamed and shook her, but she didn't move. As the doctor in me came out, I searched frantically for a pulse. My own one was echoing in my ears, and I couldn't make a decision. For a short moment I believed to feel it, but then it disappeared.

Why was everyone around me wandering in Death's shade? Had I condemned them the moment they came into my life? I couldn't move on like this, I couldn't bear with all the pain and the guilt... I wanted to cry, but nothing came out. I just stared at her body. A hideous kink to her neck only then caught my eye. It was in no way reconcilable with life.

I heard foot steps behind me. I didn't even bother to turn around, I just wanted him to finish me already. What more could he do? 

"Come on, do it. I see no point in running away from the death."  I said calmly.