I'm Sorry

Chapter 20

Mekayla's P.O.V

I am currently sitting on the bed in Nash's room, I have gotten real close to him over the past couple days. We were just talking about anything and everything.

"After I said that Carter just yelled Püma out of nowhere and we all died laughing" Nash finishes up his story. I laugh and close my eyes. When I reopen them Nash's face is much closer to mine. He slowly starts to inch his way closer to me. I freeze not sure what to do. His lips met mine, at first I don't react but I soon snap out back to reality and kiss back.

After a minute I pull away. I- I don't know what to say? I don't know where we stand? What about Connor?

So many questions pop into my head as the room stays silent. Nash was suppose to be my best friend, the kiss essentially suppose to happen. God that kiss has put me in a very confused state.

Finally after what seemed like forever Nash spoke up. "So uh where does that uh put us?"

"I- I don't know?" I say but it comes out more of a question (A/N: does that even make sense?)

"I don't know either? But I kinda li-liked it" he continues to stutter

"I think I did too" I say even tho I'm completely confused

"Well then I have to ask you the one question I've been wanting to ask since I first met you" he pauses and I nod urging him to continue

"Will you Mekayla Espinosa be my girlfriend?" Hope fills his eyes. What do I say? I don't know! I'm so fricken confused but why? Why am I confused it's just a question. A question in which the answer may hurt someone.

The hope in his eyes slowly fade as don't answer. I've made up my mind, I know my answer but I will hurt someone.

"Nash I like you a lot but not in the way you like me, I think you of you as my best friend. I'm sorry but the answers no" I totally just friend zoned him.

"Oh, uh ok um I'll just uh- I gotta go meet- I gotta go" he stutters and runs out of his own hotel room.

I knew I'd hurt someone any answer I would've said would've hurt someone. I hate that but I'm just gonna have to get over it and hope that Nash does too.

I get up and walk to my room with my head down. On the way there I bump into someone, I look up to see Carter.

"Hey have you seen Nash!" He asks

"No- he's not in his room, he ran out after the- uh No I haven't seen him" with that I take off towards my room. I hear Carter calling my name but I don't stop till I'm sitting on the bed in my hotel room.

I just keep thinking. Thinking about everything which is probably the worst thing to do. It's like I'm a prisoner in my own head, I can't escape these thought I can't run from them or hide there just there eating me alive from the inside out, preventing me from sleep. My thoughts keep me trapped inside own head unable to return to reality. My problem is I listen to my thoughts. I let my thoughts take over my body.

I am pulled away from my thoughts by a tap on my shoulder. I jump and look in the direction it came from to find Matt sitting there.

"Jesus Christ Matt you scared me!" I say hold my hand over my heart

"Sorry so whatcha thinking about?" He says with a slight chuckle at the end

"Nothing, uh why are you here exactly?"

"Ok first rude! And second we're honing to get dinner so come on" he says pulling me out the door

"Ok ok Matt you can stop dragging me now, where are we going?"

"we're going to this pizza place just up the road from the hotel"

"Ok"

The rest of the walk there was quiet. When we get to 'Mario's Pizza Palace' (A/N: I have no idea if that's a real place or not) we go inside and see everyone seated and talking, even Nash was there which surprised me. I sit down next to Matt. We talked for awhile until our waiter came he looked around my age. He had black hair and piercing green eyes, he was tall and thin. He was really cute- WAIT! no no no no no NO. Shut up, stop. Nuh uh. Nope. You can't like him.

We order 2 large pizzas and eat. After we eat we go back to the hotel and go to bed since it's quite late and we have to get up early tomorrow to catch our flights.

I change into sweatpants and a tank top. I throw my hair into a mess bun and walk out of the bathroom. I see Connor laying there. He's been sleeping with me (NOT LIKE THAT YA NASTIES) for a while because I keep having nightmares about mom and dad's accident. He makes me feel safe and when he's next to me I don't have to nightmares but when he's not here beside me the nightmares come. That's why I'm freaking out for tomorrow because I'm going back to Virginia and he's going back to Cali.

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Ok guys I decided to end it there. Tell me whatcha think.

Oh remember last chapter when I did a little foreshadowing. Yeah that one. Well comment whatcha think it means.

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Eat pizza

* winks *

BYYYYYYEEE